The Girl in the Coffee Store
by HummingAtNight
Summary: AU fic: After two failed marriages and none of his books getting published, Richard Castle and his daughter moved into his mother's place and work in her coffee store, Muse. As a struggling writer, Castle is determined to get published. Can one of his regular customers, homicide detective Kate Beckett, change all that with a little inspiration? (Set in 2011 - Season 3).
1. Chapter 1

AU fic where Castle never managed to get his books published (but still changed his name to Castle) and instead works in his mother's coffee shop, Muse. After marrying and divorcing both Meredith and Gina, leaving him with nothing but Alexis, he moved in with his mother and continued to attempt to start his writing career. Turns out all he really needed was some inspiration from a homicide detective named Kate Beckett. (Set in 2011 – Season 3 so Beckett is still with Josh)

* * *

Birds flying high  
You know how I feel  
Sun in the sky  
You know how I feel  
Breeze driftin' on by  
You know how I feel  
It's a new dawn  
It's a new day  
It's a new life  
For me  
And I'm feeling good, I'm feeling good

* * *

7am on Monday morning Castle waited anxiously for his favourite regular in his mother's coffee shop, Muse. Although he would never admit it, he was head over heels in love with her, his heart fluttered as she spoke her order to him as he stared into the depths of her deep hazel eyes. Castle had memorized her order for about 8 years now: grande skim latte with two pumps of sugar free vanilla. Ever since she had showed up that first day with her police uniform on he had fallen for her... And she probably didn't care he existed.

Sure she knew his name, he wore a name tag for god's sake, but to her he was probably just "that guy" who serves her coffee, a friendly face that she sees every morning. Nothing more.

He still remembers after about two weeks of her walking into Muse, when this woman was just a face without a name; she had asked what his surname was. He was confused at first until she explained that it was a "cop thing". Then he understood. She wanted to call him by his surname.

"Castle," he said with pride in his voice, "My name is Richard Castle".

"Kate Beckett," she smiled passing her coffee cup to her left hand as she shook his hand with her right. "I just figured if I was going to see you every morning I should at least know your name and you should know mine".

Castle grinned, "Yeah, sure, of course," but his eyes were still glued to hers, the attraction between them like magnets. He just hoped she could feel it too.

"Anyway," she broke eye contact, "I'll see you tomorrow, Castle?" she asked with hope in her voice, tasting his name on her tongue for the first time.

"Until tomorrow Miss Beckett," he spoke quietly mesmerized by her, his eyes still fused to her, watching as she left his mother's store.

Ever since that day Castle was there every morning at 7am waiting for Kate Beckett. Whether it was weekday or weekend he was there, and he wouldn't allow anyone to take that early morning shift from him. He had watched Beckett (and her hair) grow from a lowly uniform all the way up to becoming a detective, and he had even served her coffee on the house for a week when she broke the news. He had seen her through good times and rough times, but somehow still managed to make her smile whenever he saw her.

But the days when Beckett didn't come in that was when Castle worried. She had a dangerous job, what if she had been shot or killed? Would anyone even come to tell him what had happened? The smile she gave as he passed her coffee over the counter brightened his day, his life. He didn't want to think of a day where he wouldn't see that smile anymore, never. But she always came back.

Yet he was just her barista. Why would she care about him?

Kate Beckett had also met his entire family: his mother, even Alexis when she helped out sometimes before school. To Castle, Beckett was part of his family. More than once she had even taken home one of his manuscripts to read and she _loved_ them. Of course she critiqued him in some parts of his writing, this was Beckett after all. The detective spoke about how they helped her. In which way exactly he didn't know, but if Castle knew that he helped her even the smallest bit then he could die a happy man.

However, what he hadn't told her was that he was thinking about writing a series of novels about her... In actual fact, he had already written three. The only people that had read these three books though were his mother and Alexis, as they read all his unpublished fiction and helped him to improve his writing. Both red heads had questioned whether the detective in the story was based on Detective Beckett - Nikki Heat, he had called her. Castle was pretty sure that if Beckett ever found out she would either, one, think it was really adorable and love him forever, two, hate him for turning her into a fictional character but eventually forgive him after he promises to never send it to a publisher, or three (his least favourite option), not feel the same way about him, never come into his mother's coffee shop ever again and hate him forever. Yeah, he was definitely screwed.

But, according to Martha and Alexis, these novels were the best he had ever written, better than any of his previous Derrick Storm books and were very likely to get published. They were all inspired from stories that Kate had told him from the precinct. She was the most stunning woman he had ever met: sweet, savvy, sexy, smart. She was his everything.

The bell from the door of the store pulled him out of his daydream. As he looked up, a colossal grin took hold of Castle's face. It was her.

"Morning, Beckett," he had started calling her Beckett after he noticed she would never call him Rick. "The regular?" the barista asked.

"Yes please," she smiled back at him.

"Coming right up," he said turning his back to her and pulling all sorts of leavers and buttons to make Kate her coffee. "Haven't seen you for a few days. Everything okay?"

"Yeah, yeah Castle. Don't worry about me. I've just been busy with a case I've been working on," she was touched by his concern and gave Martha a small wave as she saw the woman behind the double doors behind Castle sorting out their new delivery of coffee beans.

"Good," he turned round back to face her, fumbling around looking for a lid to put on her coffee cup. "I was worried you had left me for Patterson's shop across the street," he teased, still searching for a lid.

Beckett lifted up a plastic lid from behind the counter and Castle's face relaxed as he saw what she was holding. She handed it over the counter and he put it on her cup. "Oh Castle," she grinned, "Do you really not know by now that I'm a one barista girl?" He shrugged. "Anyway," she continued, "I was wondering whether you had anymore manuscripts for me to read."

"Oh, so that's why your here? Not for my wonderful coffee making talents? Detective Beckett, you wound me." They had been friends for long enough to know that he was kidding.

"Come on, Castle, I'm serious. You haven't given me anything new to read for ages. You know I don't like the published stuff as much as yours."

"Detective Beckett, was that a compliment? Are you sure you're feeling okay?"

"Castle, stop avoiding the question with sarcasm, do you have something new for me or not?"

He swallowed, "Okay, no, I'm sorry. I don't." the barista murmured slowly trying to ignore the sadness lingering on the detective's face.

"Why not?" she demanded and Castle opened his mouth to reply but she spoke before he could get a word out. "Castle, you have a wonderful talent. I don't care that you might never get published; it shouldn't stop you from doing what you love. Will you at least think about trying it again? You never know, this next one might be a hit." Wow. He never realized how much his books meant to her until now. Did she really love his books that much?

"I knew you only came here for my books," he mumbled, teasing her again.

"Well there's that. And the fact that you do make the best coffee in New York," she grinned and Castle smiled back.

The detective looked down at her watch, 7:15am. She knew she had to leave soon or she would be late for work. "Look Castle, I've got to go. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Until tomorrow, Detective," he sighed as he watched Beckett stride away and open the door, but suddenly she stopped, "Oh, and Castle?" His eyes flicked up from wiping down the counter. "I expect you to start writing again or I'll start going to Patterson's until you do," she threatened.

"Yes ma'am!" he saluted her, "Scout's honour."

"You were never a scout," she scowled.

"Fine," he gleamed. "But I was serious about the whole writing thing".

"Good. I'll see you tomorrow. Have a good day, Castle."

"You too" he was about to say but she had already gone.

"So," his mother pulled him out of his thoughts, entering into the room with a dramatic flair, "When are you going to tell her the truth?"

"The truth? The truth about what, mother?" he replied.

"Oh please Richard, I can hear _everything_ through those double doors. Why didn't you just tell her you were still writing?"

"Because, mother, she'll hate me! She'll never want to come into Muse again if she finds out I wrote three novels about her that practically scream "I love you"."

"But you do love her, don't you?"

Castle sighed. Yes, yes he really did. He loved her to the moon and back, more than Romeo could have possibly ever loved Juliet, but that's exactly why he couldn't tell her. He didn't want to scare her away. The barista was worried that he couldn't even survive a week without seeing her smile, the way her dark down hair tumbled over her shoulders in waves as sensational as the sea, her eyes rich, as strong as a lioness. No, he couldn't be without her.

"Look Richard, you don't need to tell her that Nikki Heat is based on her and that you're Jameson Rook. She may not even notice."

"Mother, she's a detective. Of course she'll notice. And besides, I'm sure she doesn't feel the same way. I'm just a barista; she's the best cop in New York City. She probably has a boyfriend and a line of men dying to be with her. She'd never go out with a guy like me."

"Darling, don't be so hard on yourself. She's been through those doors over there almost every day for the past 8 years; I think there's more to that gal than meets the eye Richard." Castle sat down on the stool behind the counter.

"You know, maybe your right. Maybe I should just give her one of the manuscripts, tell her I wrote this a few weeks ago and that I was worried about what people would think about it, that I wasn't sure if I liked the storyline. She'd understand, right?"

"With the way that gal looks at you of course she will," and with that the bell to the shop rang again with a new customer arriving. "You go serve that gentleman, Richard; I've got some coffee beans to sort out". As his mother walked away he was sure that he heard her mumble "I wish you would just kiss that girl while you're both still young", but he ignored it and went back to doing what he did best: serving coffee.


	2. Chapter 2

So this is going to sound really stupid but I think I got my tenses mixed up *awkward*, but hopefully it's okay so yay :D enjoy! X Verity.

* * *

At last  
My love has come along  
My lonely days are over  
And life is like a song

Oh yeah yeah  
At last

The skies above are blue  
My heart was wrapped up in clover  
The night I looked at you

* * *

Kate Beckett had been visiting Martha Rodger's coffee shop for almost 8 years now, every morning greeted with the smile of Richard Castle. She doesn't know how but she thinks she might be in love with him. It all happened from the first time they met: this instant attraction, electricity in the air like she had never felt before, enticing her to come closer to him, to be _with_ him... and she liked him. A lot.

He had seen her through some tough times: dealing with the grief from losing her mother over Christmas, crying over her alcoholic father or even upset because of a tough case; he would always make her feel better. If he noticed she was losing weight he would always encourage her to buy a bear claw with her coffee and when that didn't work he would let her have it "on the house". It was nice to know that he cared, that he wanted to see her smile, be happy, like the old Kate Beckett that the detective thought had died with her mother.

She wasn't sure if he knew about her past of losing her mother, and if he did Castle never said anything. But every year around Christmas he would make an extra effort to make her feel joyful again, even if it was just by giving her a flower from one of the nearby tables in the shop.

Kate loved to see Alexis and Martha in Muse too. They were so sweet to her and treated her like she was family, the family that she no longer had. Sure, her father was sober now but the detective still wasn't able to trust whether he would fall back down the rabbit hole of alcoholism that scared her so much. Muse was a part of her now. At one point she was even sure that Castle might love her but he never asked her out. Instead he married Gina, a publisher at Black Pawn, but his books still never got published and when he and Gina didn't work out they divorced. And he _still_ never asked her out.

Thoughts of Gina caught Beckett off guard as she ambled to the precinct and willed the tears that threatened to fall away. She remembers all the nights that she cried herself to sleep as she thought about how, while she laid in bed curled up with one of his manuscripts, Castle was probably taking Gina out to dinner, or watching a movie with her, or making love...

No, no. It was a terrible time for her. She even stopped going to Muse all together for a couple of days while Gina was around. It took Beckett all but a week until she broke and finally went back to see her favourite barista.

"Where did you go?" Castle asked her, so unaware of the heartbreak she was currently feeling.

"I was out of town," she lied, avoiding eye contact with him. "I just had to get away from it all." The detective explained simply and he hummed with understanding. He noticed something was wrong when he gave Kate her usual cup of coffee that there was no smile of thanks on her face, only sadness.

In that moment both Castle and Beckett realized something. Castle realized that he honestly cared more deeply about Detective Beckett than he ever would his own wife, whereas Beckett realized that she needed to move on from the man who served her coffee every morning, her novelist. They were just friends, and probably would never be any more than that.

This epiphany caused a sudden change in Kate's behaviour and Castle picked up on this. She started going on dates again, finally agreed to go out with a robbery detective called Demming (although that didn't last long), and the reason why she's presently dating Josh Davison.

She likes Josh, she does... Just not as much as a certain barista named Richard Castle. She's pretty sure Lanie sees it too. She just isn't in love with Josh and now and then he gets jealous of Castle. He knows about Castle and Muse and that it's like a place of sanctity for her, but probably not how much it means to the detective.

But she's with Josh, not Castle.

And as if it was impossible to resist Castle with all the kind things he did for her, his deep blue eyes and undeniable charm; his books were one of her favourite things about him. They spoke to her in ways Kate didn't even think were possible. They helped her through her mother's murder although she would never admit that to anyone. He's her favourite author and she's also kept all the manuscripts he ever gave her. Sometimes the detective hides and reads them whenever she feels upset or lonely or even just misses him.

Yes, she was definitely in love with him, but it was clear he didn't feel the same way about her otherwise he would've made his move already, right? And now he wasn't even writing books anymore? He had to keep writing for her sanity. Kate Beckett had now got to the stage where she wasn't sure who she was without his novels. She was a grieving daughter, she was a deranged cop, but she definitely wasn't Detective Beckett.

She sighed, finally reaching the steps to the 12th. It was going to be a long boring day of paperwork -great.

She rode up the elevator with L.T., wishing him good morning and then stepped off when it reached her floor. "Morning Beckett," Esposito called across the room as he saw her dump all her belongings on her chair and placed her coffee on her desk. "You been seeing your coffee boy again?" he asked pointing at her coffee cup.

"Maybe," and a small smile played across her lips at the thought of Castle, "Not that it's any of your business," Beckett added quickly.

"Oh I'm pretty sure it is Beckett," he replied.

"Really? So... how's Lanie?" she smirked, sitting down.

"I don't think that's any of you business," Esposito muttered.

"Uh huh sure," Beckett grinned sipping the rest of her coffee as Ryan came to join them emerging out of the break room.

"Morning Beckett," he said as he sat down with a steaming cup of coffee and she nodded in acknowledgement. Kate hated the precinct coffee. It was like a monkey peed in battery acid it was that vile. It was nowhere as good as Castle's - his was the perfect blend between bitter and creamy and it was magnificent.

"Looks like we've got a day of paperwork, boys," Beckett sighed as she glanced over at the pile on her desk and the other two detectives groaned. "Better get it started," she mumbled to herself.

* * *

At mid-afternoon Detective Beckett decided she needed a coffee break and some much needed fresh air. She gathered up her coat and placed it on her shoulders, protecting her from the bleak spring weather and told the boys where she was going. They both begged her to bring back some donuts and coffee from Muse which Beckett eventually agreed to.

Soon she was wandering down the streets of New York looking forward to seeing Castle's face again, and his amazing coffee. Maybe he had even thought of an idea to write about for his next novel... or at least she hoped he had.

She drifted into the warmth of the coffee shop and saw Martha behind the counter. "Katherine, Darling! Such a lovely surprise to see you this afternoon. The usual?" she asked, already making her latte.

"Yes please Martha," she spoke, trying to subtly peak behind the red head to see if Castle was in the back. Martha, however, saw what she was doing.

"He's just gone to order some more sugar, Katherine. He'll be back in a moment. Why don't you go sit down in one of the booths," she smiled handing over Beckett's coffee.

"Of course Martha, thank you," she cradled her coffee close to her and took it to the closest booth so that she could still watch through the double doors in order to see when Castle returns. Five minutes later she spots him.

"Beckett, what are you doing here?" he greets her as he sits down to join her.

"I needed a break from paperwork," she grinned, "And I also promised Ryan and Espo donuts."

"Ah, of course. I haven't seen them recently, how are they?"

She shrugged. "Oh you know; same as usual."

"Good," he smiled looking into her eyes again, the same way as he had for the past 8 years while she fiddled with the top of her coffee cup.

"Also," she began, meeting his eyes, "I was wondering how the writing was coming along."

Castle swallowed hard. "Right, Beckett, about that," he fumbled. "I lied before."

Her eyes went wide instantly, but before she could say anything the barista held up his hand and continued to speak. "I've already written a novel." She moved to speak again, question him about how he could possibly dream to lie to her, but he cut her off. Was he not going to let her read his books anymore? Did he not trust her?

"Kate, before you say anything, you just have to know I was worried about what you think about it and-"

"Why?" she demanded. "Castle, you've let me read every novel you've written so far; why not this one?"

"Kate, I'm not saying you can't read it," her face immediately relaxed slightly and she gave a sigh of relief. "In fact," he continued, "the manuscript is upstairs. I'll go get it for you when I get a minute... I'm just not very confident about this storyline yet, I'm not sure if people will like it," he mumbled.

"Castle, I love every single one of your novels. What's so different about this one?"

"Nothing," he whispered. "I just want it to be special I guess."

She smiled and looked in his eyes. "Thank you Castle," she spoke with sincerity in her voice, "for trusting me."

"Always," his eyes glistened as they found hers. They stayed like that for a while, simply enjoying the feeling of losing themselves in each other's eyes; until the bell to the door rang announcing a new customer, and shattering Castle and Beckett's moment.

"So this novel," the detective began, "What's it called?"

"Heat Wave," he said nervously, trying to gage her reaction.

She hummed with intrigue. "What's it about?" she asked.

He swallowed again, still worried about how well she'll take the news that he wrote a novel about her. "...And ruin the surprise? No Beckett; no spoilers."

"But Castle," she whined, but he couldn't take her seriously. She was so cute when she was grumpy at him.

"Look, I'll go grab the manuscript from upstairs, then tonight you'll take a nice long bath with my novel and tomorrow morning at 7am when you come through those doors you'll tell me what you think of the beginning. Deal?"

"Deal," she agreed.

"Good, now go get Ryan and Espo their donuts and coffee," he gestured towards his mother serving another customer. "I'll be back in a flash."

Beckett rolled her eyes at his as she made her way over to Martha. She ordered a whole set of donuts for the precinct. They'd all had a long day, she figured, so why not. Plus, it also doesn't hurt to repay Castle a little for everything he gives her for free.

A few moments later Castle returned with the manuscript. "Woah, Beckett," he sniggered as he caught sight of her holding a pack of 12 donuts. "You got enough donuts there?"

"They're not just for me and the boys; they're for the rest of the precinct too." The barista thought it was adorable how she felt the need to explain herself to him.

"Anyway," he started, "here's the manuscript." He was about to hand it over to her but then Castle realized that she was holding three coffee cups and a large box of donuts. "Urm, do you want a hand or something?"

"Castle, don't be ridiculous, I can carry this stuff a few blocks; I'm a big girl. Do you have a bag or something I could use?"

"Sure," he said diving behind the counter, watching out for his mother who was dancing around him making lattes. He eventually found one and held the bag open for the detective who placed her items into it, with Martha quietly watching the whole exchange. Once that was done, Castle passed the bag back over to Beckett, gave her a small grin and she wished him goodbye with the promise to return the next morning with thoughts about _'Heat Wave'_.

The barista watched Beckett stride out of Muse with his heart in his mouth, the anxiety over what he just did finally settling in. He had just given the woman of his dreams, his inspiration, and his muse the novel that would literally make or break his relationship with her. Castle just hoped it wouldn't make her run away.

"Aren't you two domestic," his mother smirked as she sprinkled chocolate shavings onto a mountain of whipped cream, pulling him out of his thoughts. Castle huffed in response, unable to concentrate on anything other than his detective. Eventually the red head gave him a sharp nudge to the bicep and Castle went back to making coffee with his resolution ringing in his ears: he wouldn't let her run.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer:** Castle isn't mine, it's Marlowe's (you can tell because if it was mine, there would be a lot more sex scenes).

* * *

If only if only I coulda been yours  
Been your rapport and yours to adore  
If only if only I would've said yes  
Forgotten the rest oh I could've said yes  
If only if only you'd ask me again  
I'd give you my hand  
Let you take me  
across the sand

Into the blue  
And faded world of my daydreams  
I feel I'm falling deeper everyday  
Melting away down a dark and endless abyss  
I'm grasping at straws and I'm chasing the wind  
As I fall on my face over and over again

* * *

After Beckett left Muse the day was mostly dull, and at 9pm Castle and his mother shut the shop up for another night. They ambled tiredly up the building stairs to his mother's apartment which was located just above the store. The apartment was small but it was homely and decorated in bright colours that could only be described as true Martha style.

Entering the apartment, Castle arrives in the dining room with a long, dark wooden table in the centre, hot pink flowers brightening the table and red velvet tinted wallpaper. Photographs that framed the walls were of Castle when he was younger, Alexis, and even a few of Martha from her acting days, which made Castle chuckle every time he saw them. On the other side of this room was the living room with multiple chairs and couches placed around a glass coffee table, and an old TV sat in the corner.

Off the dining room to the right was a modest kitchen with spotlights to illuminate the space, given the fact that it had no windows. The cabernets all had wood finishes and cream tiles covered the floor. The barista seemed to spend more time in this room than anyone else in the household. Castle wasn't overly enthusiastic about cooking, but he did love to do it now and again (also he and Alexis were the only ones who could actually make edible food).

"Richard, be a dear and make us some spaghetti carbonara, would you?" the red head asked. "Alexis is in her room," she added.

"Of course," he smiled. Castle genuinely owed his mother more than he could ever say. After he divorced Meredith he was left nothing other than a small baby, he didn't even have anywhere to live. Without giving it a second thought, Martha invited them into her home, gave him a job in her coffee shop, and they've never looked back since... apart from with Gina.

Castle told himself that he wasn't making another mistake, that Gina was _perfect_ for him. Only she wasn't, he was merely trying to believe she was. She was sexy, smart, understood the book industry better than anyone else he knew. They was supposed to be faultless together, they made so much sense on paper. However, Castle soon realized that no one lives their lives on paper. His mother once told him that, "love doesn't make sense," and after divorcing Gina too he's lived by that motto.

The truth is that he was painstakingly trying to get Detective Beckett out of his head. She filled his mind: she was his first thought in the morning and the last at night. The barista saw her in everything: the way her brow furrowed when she was confused, the way she would shiver when it snowed, the way her nose would crinkle when she smelled a flower... _everything_. Even when he was with Gina, so sure he was in love with the publisher; the only woman he genuinely loved was the girl in the coffee store who showed up at 7am every morning, requesting a grande skimmed latte with two pumps of sugar-free vanilla.

With that thought, Alexis pondered into the kitchen carrying a text book. "Need any help Dad?" she asked.

"No thanks, sweetie," he said pouring the spaghetti into a pot on the stove. Castle had no idea how Alexis ended up the kind, good-hearted teenager she is... especially with his and Meredith's genes. He shuddered at the thought. "You got a physics test?" he inquired pointing to the book in her hand.

"Yeah, on Wednesday, but it's only on Newton's first three laws of motion so I'm pretty sure it's going to be easy," she shrugged casually. Yep, he has no idea how she's his, but she is. The barista grinned with joy.

"What?" his daughter asked, confused by the smile on his face.

"Just you," he hummed, pulling her into a hug. Castle was completely lost in thought until Alexis yanked on his sleeve.

* * *

"Dad," she spoke but he wasn't listening. "Dad!" she demanded, louder this time and pulled on his shirt.

"Hmmm, what?" her father answered, entirely lost in what was happening.

"The spaghetti is overflowing," she said squarely, pointing to the steaming water streaming out of the pot.

"Oops!" he shouted running over, fixing the problem as fast as he could.

Alexis couldn't say she was surprised; it was exactly like her dad to do something like this. She loved her him, but he was still a child at heart. Although that was usually a good thing (he let her go out to parties, trusted her to be responsible, didn't bug her to do her homework etc., etc.), she never really had a parental figure that she could talk to about, well... girly stuff. I mean, of course Alexis had her mother and Martha (however crazy they may be) and she loved them too, but she never had figure that she _connected _to. Not until she met Kate Beckett.

Beckett was the first woman the red head met who was _real_, who was more than just a pretty face with hair and makeup. She was smart, really smart. During their first encounter, Detective Beckett was just a uniform struggling to fulfil her calling as a detective. Nonetheless, even back then Beckett was like royalty to her. In a child's frame of mind, a woman who is both beautiful and stunning like a princess, and as brave and fearless as a Jedi, is possibly the most amazing woman you could ever meet. She still remembers seeing the detective that day: it was around 4pm and Alexis had just got home from school. She recalls coming through the shop, frozen in awe of the elegant woman speaking to her dad.

"Alexis," he beamed, running in front of the counter to greet his daughter, "come here. There's someone I want you to meet," he continued, gesturing to the woman holding a latte. "This is Kate Beckett, the cop I've been telling you about. Beckett, this is my daughter."

They both exchanged hellos, Alexis hiding shyly behind her father. She was only 10 back then and the red head giggled thinking back on how hesitant she was shaking hands with Kate the first time. Unlike her father, the detective convinced the girl to call her "Kate" rather than "Detective Beckett" and Kate was now what Alexis considered a good family friend.

Ever since they were acquainted the cop had insisted on buying gifts for Castle's daughter on her birthday (and Alexis did the same for Beckett), they continue to go out for coffee now and again if the red head ever needs someone to talk to, and it helps the girl to have a figure like that in her life. Alexis had felt sure that something was going on between Beckett and her father, but as far as she could work out, nothing ever had. On a few occasions Beckett had been invited over for dinner or movie night, but that was the extent of it. Castle had never dated the cop; and one day, when Alexis was feeling brave, she questioned her father about it.

"Dad?" she padded into her father's room, as he typed steadily on the computer at his desk. He didn't look up, only murmured in response. Alexis never took it personally, particularly when he was in one of his writing hazes, so she continued to speak anyway. "Why aren't you going out with Kate?"

That stopped him writing. "What?" Castle asked, wondering whether he'd heard his daughter correctly.

"I said, 'why aren't you going out with Kate?' Why are you going out with Gina instead? Is there something wrong with her?"

He sighed, "No pumpkin, there's nothing wrong with Kate."

"Then why aren't you going out with her?" the red head demanded. "I thought you liked Kate."

"I do like her sweetie, it's just... it's complicated."

"Complicated? No dad, algebra is complicated." Castle opened his mouth to speak, but Alexis cut him off. "I just don't understand," she spoke with tears welling up in her eyes, "I thought you loved her."

Castle exhaled and spun round in his chair so that he faced Alexis more. The barista signalled to his bed for his daughter to sit down, which was located behind his chair. The room was smaller than he would've liked, but in all honesty he was just happy to have somewhere to sleep. When they moved in with his mother he was persistent that Alexis should have the larger bedroom. Castle wanted her to have as much as he could possibly give her, and his daughter was always very grateful for that.

"Alexis," he began, unsure how to do this. He wasn't really sure himself why he was going out with Gina, how was he supposed to explain it to his only child? "The thing about Gina and I is that we make sense-"

"So?" the girl interrupted, "You and Beckett make sense too."

"No pumpkin, there's where you're wrong. While Beckett is a wonderful woman, and I know you like her, but she just wouldn't be interested in a guy like me."

"A guy like you?" she questioned, "What's wrong with being a barista?"

"No, nothing's wrong with being a barista, it's just... she and I are friends," he explained, "Nothing more. And although I would love to be with her, I simply don't think she wants us to be together."

"Have you asked her?"

"No, I haven't. But you know what?" he went on, leaning back in his chair, "I'm very happy with Gina, happier than I have been in years. And Beckett, she's got her own path to follow. I do like her, I like her a lot, but she and I just wouldn't work." What Castle didn't mention is the fact that if he even made a move on the detective she would run to the hills and he'd probably never see her again. He wouldn't be able to cope with that, and presumably neither would Alexis. Her own mother walked out on her and if Beckett did too? No, he needed her. She's addictive, more addictive than nicotine and cocaine combined could possibly ever be... But that's a very dark comparison. Let's go with chocolate.

"So, the reason you're not going out is because you don't think it'd work out?"

"Precisely. And I'm fine with that because that means that she and I will be friends for years, decades even," despite the fact that I love her, the barista added on in his mind.

"And I still get to see her?"

"Of course you still get to see her." I just can't scare her away, his mind added again. Castle refused to ruin the fragility of their relationship, and as long as Beckett kept on showing up, he could die a happy man.

From that moment on Alexis never bothered her father about the detective again, even if she wasn't completely happy about the entire situation. She had never really liked Gina, and as terrible as it sounds to say it, she was glad when her father divorced her. The more the publisher was around, the less Kate was around and the more depressed her father got. Those weren't happy times for anyone, not even Gina. The blonde was only around for about 6 months after they got married and it was a relief when she left. She and Castle were quite frankly not in love.

The red head couldn't condemn her father for what he did. One Saturday, soon after the marriage was over, she heard Kate whisper into Castle's ear "We are bound by our choices, but we are more than our mistakes". She muttered that her Captain, Montgomery, had told her that on a bad day; just being around the cop made her father smile. Alexis was sure they were in love. And a few years later, when her father started writing the Nikki Heat novels, she just _knew_: it was love.

"Alexis!" Castle yelled, searching around the apartment. "Alexis? Where are you?" He finally found her on the couch, reading a page on Sir Isaac Newton.

"Sorry dad," she responded shaking her head, trying to suppress all thoughts from her daydreams. "I must've got distracted with Newton's Third Law," Castle looked confused, "You know, 'each action has an equal and opposite reaction'..." she elaborated, "Seriously, Dad?"

"Sorry sweetie, I can't say physics was ever my strong suit."

She shrugged, "Anyway Dad, what did you want?"

"Oh, dinner is ready." With that, both Castles went to join Martha in the dining room who was already setting the table.

"Looks good, Dad," Alexis smiled.

"Thanks," he replied, "now let's go eat."

* * *

After dinner, Alexis went to bed and Castle and his mother sat on the couch with their red wine, talking peacefully.

"You know Richard, I was very proud of you today," Martha stated.

"What for?" the barista questioned.

"You giving Katherine that novel."

"Yeah, well," Castle started, placing his wine glass on the glass table in front of them, sitting up to face his mother, "it doesn't feel great."

"Why?" she asked, "It only took you three years to finally pluck up the courage to give her the damn thing."

"But what if she doesn't like it?" Castle feared. "What if she never wants to see me again? Or you? Or Alexis? What if she hates the fact that I wrote a novel about her without even asking her permission?"

"Richard, Darling, calm down. I can literally feel your anxiety filling the room."

"Sorry," he mumbled.

"You know, it's okay to be afraid of what she might think, but Darling you need to relax, have a glass of wine," she spoke pointing to his discarded glass on the table, "Everything will work out in the end."

"But what if it's like Alexis's physics? 'Every action has an equal and opposite reaction?' Mother you know what that means-"

"Richard, those are laws of motion, not The Laws of Kate Beckett. And for all you know that gal could love that book. Besides, isn't it better to live with "what ifs" rather than "if onlys"? Whatever happens, the universe will right itself again. You just need to make sure you do everything in your power to make sure it rights itself in the way _you_ want it to," the red head advised.

Castle nodded, "You're right."

"Didn't doubt that for a second kiddo, and neither should you."

"Gladly noted," he smiled.

"Good. Now, we've got an early start in the morning, cakes and coffee to make and so forth. Night Darling," Martha finished, leaving a kiss on the top of her son's head.

"Night Mother," Castle spoke distractedly, half promising himself that no matter what happened tomorrow, he would make sure that he and Beckett were good. Even if it took him another 8 years for her to trust him again, he would make sure they were okay. They quite honestly, from the bottom of his heart, they simply _had_ to be.

* * *

A/N: yeah... I'm a physics kind of girl at heart :D hope you enjoyed! **X Verity.**


	4. Chapter 4

Everyone who got the "Let's go with chocolate reference" in the last chapter gets a hug okay :)

* * *

And I find it kinda funny  
I find it kinda sad  
The dreams in which I'm dying  
Are the best I've ever had

I find it hard to tell you  
I find it hard to take  
When people run in circles  
It's a very, very mad world, mad world

* * *

Beckett got home at about 7pm that night, stumbling in on a tired, yet cheerful, Josh Davidson cooking her dinner. They ate peacefully together, murmuring small talk and exchanging stories about their days. When they finished they both did the dishes (despite Josh insisting that he should do it) and soon ended up curled up on the couch together watching TV.

"You know," Beckett started, "I feel like having a bath," she voiced, standing up, not mentioning to Josh the real reason why.

"Mind if I join you?" he asked, about to get off the couch too.

"Urm, yes..." she spoke unsurely, receiving a confused look from the man in her apartment, "I just need some alone time," she explained. It wasn't a complete lie and Kate didn't want to hurt his feelings but she could practically feel Heat Wave burning a hole in her bag all afternoon at the precinct. She was _dying_ to read it.

"Yeah, no I get it," muttered Josh schooling his features, "You've had a long day."

"Exactly. I won't be long, I promise," she uttered, leaving her boyfriend in front of the TV. She inwardly kicked herself, reminding herself that you were supposed to want to spend time with your boyfriend, not space from him.

Shrugging off that thought, Beckett started running the bath and, knowing it would take a while to fill up, went into her bedroom to collect Castle's manuscript still hidden in her purse. She grinned at it, biting her lip reading the words "Richard Castle" written on the bottom of the cover. Shaking her head, Kate returned to the bathroom and lit the candles scattered around the room, placing her wine glass and Castle's manuscript on the side.

Baths were what the detective considered her haven, her sanctuary. It was where she had read every single one of Castle's novels and this was her favourite pastime: not catching killers, not even working on her mother's murder, it was simply settling down with one of Castle's books, reading until she almost fell asleep.

Beckett was excited to see what this new novel would be about as Castle refused to tell her earlier. She knew it would be about murders or CIA agents one way or another (those were his specialties after all), but she loved to see what kinds of characters he had created too. The relationships they held with each other drew her in as well as puzzling out in her mind who the killer could be. The detective had now made it a game with Castle to try to figure out which character was the murderer before the end of the book. So far she hadn't done too badly, if she said so herself.

Kate ran her hand up and down the length of the bath under the water, mixing and swirling the warmth around until the bath tub was full enough. She then squirted some bubble bath in for good measure and stripped off, dropping her clothes in a pile in the corner of the room. Climbing in, the detective smiled at the sensation of the heat surrounding her. It felt homely, safe.

She took a quick sip of wine, and then turned her attention to the manuscript sat beside her. Kate flicked open the book and within a few pages it soon became abundantly clear that _she_ was Nikki Heat.

They were all there: Ryan, Espo, even Lanie had been turned into fiction. Given their names in the novel weren't that different to their names in real life, it wasn't challenging to work out. Shortly afterwards came the biggest surprise yet – Jameson Rook. That's right, Rook; as in chess piece 'rook', as in the piece that looked like a castle. Yup, the reporter was based on Castle: the witty comments, the inappropriate jokes, they were all there.

The way in which Nikki was acting with Rook was a little bit like how Beckett's relationship with Castle had started out. However, Castle was less of an ass in real life and much more sensitive; more of a family man than Jameson. And Kate was less aggressive toward Castle than Nikki was towards Rook, less frustrated with him. But it was, in the end, just fiction.

She continued to skim through the pages and was coming towards the end of Chapter Three when it emerged that Nikki Heat's mother had been murdered one Thanksgiving and the case remained unsolved. It reminded her of her own mother's murder and that was undoubtedly why Nikki had a backstory. Kate wanted to cry, be outraged at the fact that he had written in something so _personal_, so true, into the novel without even asking her permission. She had never even mentioned her mother to Castle, not told him how the NYPD had written it off as "random gang violence". As far as she knew Castle didn't know anything about it. But showed how well he knew her, didn't it?

Kate couldn't stop the tears threatening to spill down on face, so she just let go. She placed the manuscript on the side and sobbed, wishing her mother was still alive and with her. She wished that her father had never turned to alcohol, that she didn't have an obsession over her mother's death, that she wasn't afraid to love someone again. The tears were streaming faster, keeping her in a state of grief and self-pity. The detective wanted that wall inside her _gone_; she wanted to be free from the pain and suffering of death. She wanted _so_ much. And one man (or woman) had snatched all of that away from her leaving her wondering "would I ever be happy again?"

"You are when you're with Castle," small voice at the back of her head reminded her, "he makes you feel alive again." Beckett willed the words to stop, but they wouldn't. She needed him, she wanted him, would do anything for him. Did he love her? She only wished he did.

* * *

Eventually Kate stopped weeping and the water around her was starting to get cold. She dried her face on a nearby towel and decided that she was done reading for the night - she just wanted to go to sleep and long for her demons leave her soul. The detective clambered out of the tub, watching the water trickle off of her skin and pulled a warm fluffy robe around her, shielding her from all the darkness in the world if only for a moment.

She checked in the mirror, luckily the heat from the water masked the fact that she had been crying. Kate slipped out of the bathroom and down the hall to her bedroom, carrying her bundle of clothes and trying as hard as possible not to bump into Josh in the small space of her apartment. Shutting the door behind her, Beckett breathed a small sigh of relief and took a second to collect her thoughts. She placed her clothes in the wash basket and then laid Castle's manuscript in the draw beside her bed, finding some leggings and a long purple top to dress herself in along the way.

"Kate?" Josh knocked on the door, wanting to give the cop her boundaries, "Is everything okay?" he asked.

Beckett frowned. Josh wasn't a bad guy; in fact he was a very nice guy: smart, sweet, handsome. But he wasn't Castle. She told herself that she was keeping one foot out the door just in case, but that wasn't it. She didn't love him. Not in the way that she felt about Castle. And so the detective felt guilty; it wasn't fair to be leading him on like this, but at the same time she wasn't sure if she could face being alone again.

"You can come in, Josh," she spoke, somehow managing to hide to waiver in her voice and plastered a fake smile onto her face. "What were you asking?"

After seeing she was fine, the worry dissipated from the doctor's face, "Oh, erm, nothing," he shrugged. He didn't comment on the fact that he had heard her weeping in the bathroom.

"Good. I was going to get an early night's sleep. I'm just tired," she justified, running a hand through her wet hair.

"Yeah, me too," he agreed. Thankfully Josh had already put his pyjamas on and jumped straight under the covers, with Beckett following soon after.

"Night Kate," he whispered, kissing her gently on the cheek.

"Night Josh," she yawned and drifted to sleep.

* * *

_Death. Blood and death; the stench filling her nostrils in the alleyway as Detective Beckett walked up to the crime scene with Esposito and Ryan following close behind her. She turned the corner and there by the trash cans she saw Castle's lifeless body positioned in the same way in which they found her mother; the dark red liquid continuing to ooze out of his many stab wounds, staining the concrete crimson._

"_Castle!" she screamed rushing towards him, cupping his cheek in the palm of her hand. His body was still warm, it must have just happened and her clothes were now covered in his blood. "Castle, please," she wept. "Castle, I need you, come back," she begged, bringing her lips close to his forehead and shaking him slightly as her tears dripped onto his body. "Castle, please," Kate sobbed. "I love you Castle, I love you. Don't leave me, please. Please," she kissed the top of his forehead and begged for him to look at her again, and again, and again..._

Kate woke up covered in sweat, tears streaming down the sides of her face. It was a dream... it was only a dream.

She looked over to see if she had disturbed Josh but he was in a deep slumber. After that nightmare she knew it wasn't likely she would get to sleep again, even if it was only 1am. Beckett dragged herself out of bed, grabbed a change of clothes and headed towards the bathroom. She washed her face down with a flannel and her arms too, trying to wash away the nightmare and drown the urge to call Castle, rising in her chest.

She had the barista's number for reasons such as this but she figured it would be inappropriate to call him at this time in the morning. The detective remembers him giving it to her, when there was a case she had finished working on that reminded her of her mother's, only Kate would probably never get any closure herself. He had found her completely by chance on the swing set in a park a few blocks away. She used to go there often with her mother and she simply sat there as tiny droplets of rain fell around her, penetrating into the ground.

"Beckett?" Castle questioned walking towards her, kept safe from the downpour by an umbrella. "What are you doing?"

"Sitting on the swings," she stated, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. He wasn't sure what to do so he just sat down on the swing next to her.

"And... Is there a particular reason why you're sat on a swing in the middle of a storm?"

She shrugged, "Not really," Kate lied, obscuring her face away from him with a lock of her hair that fallen out from behind her ear. Castle knew when and when not to push her, he had known her long enough; and right now was definitely _not_ the time to push her. He reached out his hand, Beckett watching him carefully, as he tucked the strand of hair tenderly behind her ear, their eyes never averting from each other's gaze. Her skin felt cold against his palm and Kate shivered slightly against his touch. He needed to get her somewhere warm, and fast.

"Come on," he murmured, pushing himself off the swing.

"Where are we going?" the detective asked.

"Muse. You look like you need the coffee... and the warmth."

Castle had just come back from the public library, fortunately spotting her during the rainfall. If he hadn't seen her she didn't know what she would've done. Probably stay there, getting hypothermia and emotionally distressed for another half an hour in the cold.

When they got back to Muse her gave her a latte and his number, "Just in case you need someone to talk to," he promised. She had called him a few times, usually when she needed cheering up. When she called him it was very intimate, private. They never spoke about her issues face to face.

Unsure of what to do and missing the barista, Beckett decided to read some more of Heat Wave, however annoyed she was that he had written about her mother in it. In all fairness, he _did_ write about the tragedy with incredible passion and understanding. No, she wasn't that mad.

Kate collected it from her bedroom, retreated to the living room and sat on the couch. As she kept flicking through the novel it became evident that there was some strong sexual chemistry between Nikki Heat and Jameson Rook, not much unlike her and Castle's own. "He must feel it too," she thought, and her heart fluttered.

By Chapter 9 it was relatively obvious that they were going to get together; but with body shots? Really? What kind of girl did he take her for?

Nikki and Rook went on to sleep together and Kate couldn't help but feel a sense of yearning to be with Castle. If they would be anywhere as good together as the fictional versions of them, then what the hell were they waiting for? She wanted to be with him and Heat Wave was a pretty clear indicator that he wanted to be with her; they were both such a mess. This whole 'just friends' issue and fear for losing one another was holding them back for what they could truly be together – _amazing_.

Beckett sighed and continued to read. Before she knew it she had finished the book, saying goodbye the characters kissing in the rain. It was 5am and shortly the detective fell asleep wrapped in a blanket. But this time, instead of being haunted by her demons, Kate dreamt of everything she and Castle could be... she only wished it were real.

* * *

A/N: I felt so American writing "couch" all the time... Why can't you guys just call it a sofa? Sofa is cuter :D Hope you enjoyed! **X Verity.**


	5. Chapter 5

**IMPORTANT A/N: **Okay so sorry I haven't updated – it's because of exams and all that wonderful stuff (and can I just say that you guys liked the whole sofas/couch discussion _way_ too much – and it was adorable). This is a chapter I've been promising people for a while to have a lil more info about Gina. Hopefully this answers all you guy's questions. Also, a lot of people have been asking me to do flashbacks in italics to make it less confusing so that's now a thing. **X Verity.**

* * *

Far away,  
Far away,  
Waste away tonight,  
I'm wearing my heart on a noose.  
Far away,  
Far away  
Waste away tonight.  
Tonight my heart's on the loose.

* * *

Castle's alarm went off at 6am, pulling him out of his slumber. It had taken him hours to fall asleep, his mind playing scenario after scenario about how this morning could go. Would she tell him she loved him after getting lost in his words? Tell him she hated him? Would she even turn up at all? That was his greatest fear – that he'd never see her again, not even giving him a chance to explain himself. And this caused him to work out his counter plans: what he would do if she murmured the words "I love you" (kiss her of course), if she stormed out of Muse (go after her), and finally, if she didn't turn up at all (call her, don't let her get away). He refused to let her run away like she did when Gina was around.

The barista sometimes wonders why he ever married the publisher. They met when he was trying to get his first Derek Strom novel published and failed yet again. However, she found him charming and he found her gorgeous. Before he knew it, he'd brought her a ring and it was their wedding day. That was all there was to it.

But they weren't happy, were never madly in love with each other. Not in the way he is about Beckett.

A grin tugged at the corners of his lips at the thought of her. It was insane: their attraction, chemistry, _love_ – whatever words you wanted to use to describe their connection, they all worked perfectly. He had been in love with his favourite customer for _8 years_. 8 years of coffee making building up for this _one_ moment. Castle knew he wouldn't have a second chance at the decisions he would make this morning. She either loved him or she didn't. God, he was nervous just thinking about it.

The first time he had mentioned to her that he was an aspiring writer she had looked so excited.

"_What genre do you write, Castle?" she asked intently._

"_Crime," he smiled shyly. "Do you read mystery novels, Beckett?"_

_Kate swallowed, hesitant. The truth was that since her mother died she had drowned herself in them, pouring over every word written between their spines... they were what had encouraged her to become a cop. She loved them._

"_From time to time," she shrugged. "Actually, I haven't found a good novel in a while..." she began, catching Castle's eye._

"_Oh well we can't have that now, can we Detective?" he spoke in a husky voice, instantly catching her intensions: she wanted his manuscript._

"_Would you stop with the 'Detective'?" Kate glared at him, "I told you, I'm not a detective yet."_

"_Yes, but you will be soon," he smirked._

"_And how would you know that, Castle?"_

"_Because I know everything," he stated._

_She rolled her eyes, "Yeah, sure, and I'm the President of Fantasyland."_

"_Now no need for sarcasm, Beckett. Do would want the manuscript or not?" he inquired, although he already knew the answer._

"_Yes please."_

"_Good, because today we've got a special on the house: with every manuscript you get free bear claw," he grinned, grabbing both from behind the counter. Castle knew she never ate properly at lunch so he was always trying to give her free food from Muse._

"_Castle, I'm good. I don't need your bear claw. I had a big breakfast," she lied._

"_You know, I would actually believe the thing about you being the President of Fantasyland more than you eating a big breakfast."_

"_Haha, very funny."_

"_Mock all you want Detective; you're still having the bear claw."_

"_Can I at least pay you for it?" she offered._

"_No."_

"_Fine then, but don't be surprised if I criticize your writing," she warned._

"_Go ahead Beckett. It'll only help me improve it," and she did. Every time the barista gave her a new manuscript it returned with doodles and notes drawn all over the side about her favourite and not so favourite parts of the novel. He always made it a point to read through what she had written before giving the manuscript to his publisher, just in case there was something Kate really didn't like about it and so he would change it. _

Castle was expecting her to do the same for Heat Wave – to write notes. She always did and it was one of the many reasons why he loved her. It was just one of those things that she did which was simply... _Beckett_. No one else made him laugh the way she did. No, he wasn't going to lose her.

* * *

Josh woke up sluggishly to an empty bed. He checked the alarm clock by the side: 8am. She had probably already gone to work. He got out of bed in search of food, only to find Kate sound asleep on her couch, wrapped in a blanket with a manuscript resting on the coffee table. He smiled at the detective; she always appeared so peaceful when she slept.

The doctor gazed at the novel resting on the table, assuming it was one of Castle's although he hadn't seen her with a new one for a while. Eventually, curiosity got the better of him and he picked it up, reading the title 'Heat Wave' across the cover. Yes, it was indeed another one of Castle's books.

A surge of jealously ran through him, he couldn't help it. Josh knew that Kate and the barista had been friends for years; however Beckett assured him that it was nothing more than a friendship. He was never able to fully believe her though; he saw the way she looked at Castle and he looked at her. But _he_ was her boyfriend; he should be able to trust her.

Kate had always loved Castle's novels, the doctor often found her reading one in the middle of the night when she couldn't sleep. If he didn't know any better, he would say she was addicted to them, but she promised that she only loved them so much because they helped her get though her mother's murder – and who was he to compete with that?

Josh carefully flicked open the manuscript gently, as if not to wake her, suddenly noticing Kate's comments scribbled in the margins later on in the book. He began to scan the text and soon came to the same conclusion she had only the night before: the novel was about her.

The doctor felt angry, hurt, betrayed. How could she do this to him? How could she lie? She _promised_ it was only a friendship. He had no idea Castle was writing about her otherwise he would have said something about it a _long_ time ago.

In that moment, he caught Becket stirring awake out of the corner of his eye. Josh wasn't sure what he should do. Should he shout at her? Pretend he never opened the contents of the manuscript? Apologize for going through her stuff without asking? No, they were dating; if anything she should be apologizing to _him_.

"Hey Josh," she murmured, opening her eyes a fraction, not even comprehending the fact that he was holding Castle's novel. "What time is it?"

"Kate," he started, the hurt he was feeling flooding into his voice. "What is this?"

"What's what?" she questioned sleepily, eyes still shut and burying her head deeper into her pillow.

"_This_," he practically spat at her, pointing to the manuscript in his other hand.

"Oh _that_! It's Castle's new manuscript," she explained.

"No, Kate," he sighed, "Why's it about _you_?" he inquired forcefully.

The whole room stopped. You could have cut the tension with a knife, and Beckett had no idea how to respond. Honestly, she had no idea why Castle wrote this novel about her; but she had the feeling it was because Castle might be in love with her. "Josh I'm not cheating on you with Castle, okay? We've had this discussion," she answered sternly.

"But that was before I realized he was writing a book about you," he spoke angrily.

"Yeah, well, it was before I knew that too."

"You didn't know he was writing about you?" the doctor asked.

"No, of course not. Do you seriously think I would _let_ him write a whole book based on me?"

"No, sorry, you're right," he conceded. "Then _why_ did he write about you?"

"...Maybe because of the way he feels about me," she mumbled, unable to meet his eyes.

"What?!" Josh screamed, outraged. "If you know how he feels about you then why do you keep going back there?" he questioned.

"I didn't realize – I didn't think...not until last night," Kate spoke honestly.

"Is that why you were crying?" he asked cautiously.

She was shocked. Josh knew she had been sobbing in the bathtub? But the detective quickly schooled her features in response.

"No Josh. That was about my mother," she declared, tears in her eyes.

_Oh_. Oh, not good. He was in trouble.

"Look Josh, can we not do this just now? I've got to go to work. What time is it?"

The doctor glanced at his watch, "Urm, around 8.15," he muttered.

"Josh? 8.15?! I'm supposed to be a work by now!" she screamed, "Why didn't you wake me?" the detective demanded.

"I thought you had already left!" he justified, but she was already rushing into her bedroom to get dressed. "Kate, please."

"No Josh, I am done with this. You accuse me of cheating, you go through my books, I am done with our relationship – with us," she turned around to face him, emphasizing every word. "Now when I get back here tonight I want all your stuff gone, got it?"

"Kate, come on, I know you don't mean that," he tried to laugh it off.

"Yes Josh, I do," Kate stated. "Now let me get changed in peace," she left him standing in the hallway as she stormed off into the bedroom. She was _so_ angry. How dare he accuse her of cheating? She would never do that to _anyone_. And now she didn't even have time to get a latte from Muse...

Muse, dammit, Castle! She ensured him that she would be there this morning. God, he must think she doesn't feel the same way. Beckett grabbed her phone off her bedside table and sent him a quick only hoped that this wouldn't ruin this shot of them finally admitting their feeling for each other. She loved him and she'd be damned if she let her and Josh's fighting get in the way of true happiness.

* * *

7am... no Beckett. 7.30am... again no Beckett. 8am, _still_ no Beckett.

This was it. This was his worst nightmare coming true. She didn't like 'Heat Wave', she didn't love him back, and he would never see her again.

"Richard, relax," Castle's mother told him.

"Mother, she _never_ comes in later than 8. Never," he murmured hopelessly, failing at hiding the sorrow out of his voice.

"Yeah, well, maybe she just forgot," Martha shrugged, giving him a small smile.

"Mother, please. Kate Beckett has been coming into Muse almost every day for 8 years. She wouldn't just forget," he sighed, sitting down behind the counter. "She probably never wants to see me again," he mumbled sadly, thinking to himself for a moment...

"Should I go after her?" he asked his mother, fiddling with his hands in his lap. "I should go after her, right?"

"Richard, Darling, don't be ridiculous. That gal has been missing for one hour. _One hour_, you hear?" she replied, attempting to feed her son some logic. "If she said she would be here, then she'll be here. Or she'd at least call or something."

With that, Castle's phone vibrated alerting him of a text. As he read the message, Martha could see his features slowly softening.

"Well?" she inquired once he had put the phone down.

"Beckett was running late this morning, she said she'd visit for lunch."

"Well that's fantastic news!" the red head exclaimed. "Just you wait, kiddo, next wedding could be just around the corner," she chuckled and Castle rolled his eyes.

Now he just had to think about what he was going to say to her. He just hoped that he wouldn't screw this up, not now that they were so close. Not when Beckett could finally, after 8 years, be his. He couldn't ruin this for them.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N:** I'm sorry it's been so long since I've updated I was busy celebrating no more school but for the next couple of weeks you should expect up to update at least once a week, probably twice :D Hope you guys have a great day! **X Verity.**

* * *

A storm rocks a ship on a sea  
The wind shakes the leaves on a tree  
And I'm a nervous wreck and I'm all shook up  
And that's what you're doin' to me right now  
And I'm jumpin'  
That's right, you got me shakin'

* * *

Castle watched the time ticking by on the clock opposite the counter in Muse – 11:59. It was almost lunchtime, almost time for him to see Kate Beckett again, to see what she has to say about his book.

His mind was going crazy with worry that she would hate it, ban him from ever giving it to his published ever though it was outstandingly clear that this was the best novel that Castle's ever written. She had to love it, right? If she loved all his other books, why shouldn't she love this one?

"Because all the others weren't based on _her_," a small voice at the back of the barista's spoke bluntly, making him feel uneasy. She simply _had_ to love it.

With that, the bell to the shop rang, indicating the arrival of a new customer. Castle looked up quickly, doing a double take before realizing that it was her.

It was Kate.

* * *

The day had gone slowly and Detective Beckett had sat at her desk, checking the clock about every 2 minutes waiting impatiently for her lunch break. She couldn't wait to see Castle, his smile made her day instantly better and it seemed odd going to work without seeing him first.

Luckily there had been no body drops yet today and so she would be able to sneak away as soon as the clock hit 11:45 and Montgomery actually seemed pleased that she had turned up late to work for a change. Kate was also in desperate need of caffeine. At one stage during the morning she had even grabbed a cup of the precinct coffee (before she spat it out again, anyway).

Eventually Beckett gave up waiting and left at about 11:30 instead. As she walked along the sidewalk towards Muse she thought of Ryan and Espo being nosy before she left for the coffee shop.

_As the Detective gathered up her belongings she could hear the whispers of Ryan and Esposito across the bullpen._

"_Beckett?" Ryan inquired, striding over to her desk, "Where are you going?"_

"_To Muse," she shrugged, "for lunch."_

"_Really?" Esposito smirked, joining them, "Missing your boy already?"_

"_No," she lied, "I just so happen to want some coffee." But the other two detectives could see right through her._

"_Well," Esposito started, "there's coffee in the breakroom."_

"_Drinkable coffee," she stated._

"_Right," the boys hummed._

"_Shut up. Or else I won't bring you guys any coffee back," Kate threatened._

"_C'mon Beckett, you know you love us," smiled Esposito and she rolled her eyes. _

"_Yeah Beckett, please," Ryan begged and they both gave her their best puppy eyes._

"_I'll – think about it... You boys just do your paperwork until I get back," she pulled on her jacket._

"_Pinkie promise," Esposito grinned and the two detectives began walking back to their desks. Beckett couldn't help but smile at them; she knew they only had her best interests at heart._

As she became close to Muse, Kate's anxiety grew, forming a large pit in her chest. She wasn't sure what she was going to say to Castle... She wasn't sure what he was going to say to her. And that _scared_ her.

She knew that, as much as she wanted to, she wasn't ready to dive head first into this relationship; that they would have to go slow, step by step. As much as Beckett hated to admit it, she still had a wall inside of her that she was afraid to knockdown. She wanted this relationship with him, 8 years of knowing the guy, yet she was still terrified that he would leave her just like her mother, like her father.

Kate simply couldn't depend on him as being a constant fixture in her life- she had made that mistake before. It's not that she didn't trust him, of course she did, but how did she know that he wouldn't just get bored with her and leave her for someone else? She was sure that Castle was in love with her and he still went out with Gina – it wasn't that far out of the realm of possibilities.

Beckett just needed to know that she could trust him, but her wall made that close to impossible. Nonetheless, if anyone could do it, it would be Castle.

She saw the shop across the street, crossed the road and stepped closer. Through the large glass windows at the front of the store, Kate could already see Castle and his mother behind the counter serving coffee.

This was it: 8 years building up to this moment.

"_No pressure,"_ she joked under her breath.

Using all her courage not to run, Beckett swung open the door listening to the bell ring above her. She saw Castle gaze up, and she gazed at him too not wanting to look away. It was as if they were the only ones in the room, nothing was able to break their eye contact.

At last Martha took the initiative to give her son a small nudge to the ribs, shattering the spell.

Castle shook his head, and then whispered to his mother asking if she would be alright serving the customers alone while he talked to Beckett. Martha nodded a firm "yes" and Castle guided the detective over to their favourite booth, but not without making her a latte first.

"Hey Castle," she spoke softly once they had both sat down.

"Hey," he smiled, "Here's your coffee by the way," he said passing it over to her, their fingers brushing past each other, shooting a jolt of electricity up each of their arms.

"Thank you," the detective muttered shyly.

"So..." Castle began gingerly, "How did you like Heat Wave?"

She grinned, "It was good, I loved it," Kate knew it was a huge understatement. She didn't just love the book; she was head-over-heels in love with it. "But..."

"But?" he asked nervously. Why is there always a 'but'?

"But, I can't help but draw the similarities between me and Nikki Heat."

"Right... Well," shit, how was he supposed to explain himself out of this one? "As you are a detective and a pretty amazing one too might I add; I thought that _you_ would be good inspiration for a book."

"You mean like a muse?" she questioned.

"Yes, precisely."

"So, urm... is Jameson Rook based on you?" asks Kate, getting straight to the point.

Castle sighed, twitching his hands on the table separating him and the detective. "Yes Kate. He's based on me," he admitted, using her first name for the first time in about 8 years, the word feeling foreign on his lips.

"And the sex scene...?"

He should've known this was coming next. "Look Kate, I like you. I like you _a lot_," she opened her mouth to interrupt him but he beat her to it, "And right now that doesn't have to mean anything - if you don't want it to," he added hurriedly, "But I just need to know one thing," he looked away from her, gathering up his strength, concentrating instead on his bellybutton rather than the woman sat in front of him; the barista was too frightened to watch her reaction. "Do you feel the same way?"

Rather than hearing the outraged "no" or faint "yes" that he had been dreaming off, instead he felt her curl her fingers around his right hand positioned on the table. Tentatively, he looked up, focusing on Beckett's hazel eyes.

"Yes Castle," she breathed, "I feel the same way."

He felt like the happiest man in the world in that moment, wanting to kiss her and hug her and maybe even do a happy dance all at the same time. However, if he did that she probably wouldn't agree to go out with him, so Castle settled for squeezing her hand instead, not even trying to hide the giddy grin on his face. Kate giggled in response, finding his reaction adorable.

"So..." Castle started.

"So?"

"Do you maybe want to go out sometime?" he asked, failing at keeping the nervousness out of his voice.

"Yes Castle, yes I would," grinned Kate.

"Is Friday good for you?"

"Perfect."

"Pick you up at 8?"

"Sound good," she smiled. "What should I wear?"

"Something sexy," he smirked.

"Castle," Beckett raised an eyebrow at him, although she knew he was only joking.

"Fine, something fancy."

"Got it."

"...And sexy."

"Castle," she warned and he laughed.

"Are you going to tell me where we'll be going?"

"No Beckett, I want it to be a surprise..." he actually had no idea where he was going to take her but it was only Tuesday; he had plenty of time to figure it out. Suddenly a thought crossed Castle's mind: wasn't Beckett in a relationship with someone else?

"Beckett!" he spoke abruptly in a hushed tone.

"What?" she questioned, her brow furrowing in confusion.

"Don't you have a boyfriend?" as much as it pained him to state the obvious, he couldn't go out with her knowing she was supposed to be with someone else, as much as he loved her. Not only would it hurt her boyfriend (however much Castle despised him), if Josh made Kate happy and she chose to be with him then no matter how heartbreaking it would be to see her go, at least she was happy. At the end of the day that was the only thing that mattered to Castle: Kate's happiness.

"Castle, relax, we broke up this morning."

"Kate, I'm so sorry. I wouldn't have given you the manuscript if I thought..."

"Castle, it wasn't you fault. We'd been fighting for a while now; it wasn't going to work out with him anyway. Besides," she gazed up through her lashes at the barista, "I wasn't in love with him," but I am in love with you.

Fortunately for Beckett, the barista could understand subtext and it seemed pretty clear to her that he got the message, judging by the smile on his face. The detective couldn't give him her heart, not quite yet. But when she does she wants to give it _all_ to him and hold nothing back.

They sat contently for a moment until Castle realized that it was lunchtime and he hadn't given Kate anything to eat, especially since she probably missed breakfast this morning. "Do you want a sandwich or something?" the barista offered.

"Urm, yes please, thanks," she gave a half smile.

"Sure, I'll go grab you one. Be back in a sec," and he rushed off behind the counter, not wanting to keep the detective waiting.

"So, how's it going?" Martha murmured in her son's ear, despite having subtly watched the whole conversation earlier.

"Good, we're going out on Friday," he hid his smile as he bent down to get the sandwiches, still not over the fact that Kate Beckett has practically his girlfriend now.

"Way to go, kiddo!" she exclaimed. "See, I told you that gal was in love with you. Have you decided where you're taking her yet?"

"No, not yet, but I'll figure something out."

"You better soon Richard, because with the way you two look at each other, you _do not_ want to mess this up," advised Martha and Castle nodded in acknowledgement.

"Now what are you doing still talking to me? Go!" his mother ordered pushing him back towards the detective.

When the barista returned to the table, Kate was flicking through Heat Wave, keeping her mind occupied. She shut it as soon as he came close though, not wanting to let him see any of the notes that she had written inside, wanting to leave it as a surprise for him.

"I got you cheese and tomato, is that okay?" Castle inquired pointing towards the sandwich.

"Perfect," she smiled.

"Did write notes in it?" he asked, following her eyesight down to the novel.

"Of course. Did you expect any less from me, Mr. Castle?"

"Of course not, Detective Beckett. And I can't wait to read what you wrote about my sex scene," he spoke, gazing at her lips. She bit into her sandwich to put him off and then laughed at the look on his face. They both ate in silence for a moment, both deep in thought, until Beckett spoke up.

"Can I ask you a question?" she asked gently.

He shrugged, "Sure."

"How did you know about my mom's murder?"

Castle put down his sandwich, knowing that this was an important question. "I didn't really; I just put the pieces of the puzzle together. You rarely talk about you family, alwyas upset over Christmas. It's the reason why you're a cop, isn't it? The fact that it never got solved."

She nodded sadly, avoiding eye contact, "Yes, yes it is."

"Do you ever –," he began; unsure of whether he was allowed to ask. Kate looked back up and urged him to continue. "Do you ever think about reopening the case?"

She just shook her head.

"Why not?" Castle couldn't help but ask. He always wanted the full story.

"Same reason why a recovering alcoholic doesn't drink. You don't think I've been down there? You don't think I haven't memorized every line in that file? My first three years on the force, every off-duty moment was spent looking for something someone missed. It took me a year of therapy to realize that if I didn't let it go, it was going to destroy me. And so I let it go."

"Sorry, I didn't know."

"It's okay. You deserve to know. I should've told you years ago I just never found the right time. About a year ago we found the man who killed her, Dick Coonan. He was hired by the guy behind all this but he took one of the uniforms hostage and I had to shoot him before I could find out who."

"You disappeared for a while then. I didn't see you for weeks."

"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to worry you," the detective spoke honestly.

"Have you found out any more since then?"

"No. But I will eventually, and I want you around when I do," she whispered, staring up into his bright blue eyes.

"I promise Kate. I'll be here - always."

He gave her hand a small squeeze and they finished eating their lunch with Castle constantly trying to make her laugh. The barista hated to see her upset and so put one of the daisies which decorated the table in her hair, telling her she looked beautiful as she blushed.

At 12:45 Beckett muttered that she had to get back to work and took coffee for her, Espo and Ryan with her. Castle stood tall and watched as the love of his life left the shop. He couldn't wait until he saw her breathtaking smile again tomorrow.

* * *

**A/N: **You know who also concentrates on their bellybutton? Stana Katic.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N:** another new chapter for you lucky humans enjoy! **X Verity.**

* * *

Hey Jude, don't make it bad  
Take a sad song and make it better  
Remember to let her into your heart  
Then you can start to make it better

Hey Jude, don't be afraid  
You were made to go out and get her  
The minute you let her under your skin  
Then you begin to make it better

* * *

All afternoon Castle's heart had been singing. Kate had _feelings_ for him, and he had finally admitted that he had feelings for her too. He was the happiest man in the world.

It was almost closing time for Muse and the barista was pleased knowing that he could soon read the detective's notes about his novel. Castle gazed at the manuscript which Beckett had taken home the night before, yearning to read her thoughts throughout the storyline. He knew she was a fast reader, but she had never finished one of his books in one night before; she must have really loved it.

The bell rang in announcement of a new customer, causing Castle to look up. It was a tall man - even taller than him, with dark hair and a motorcycle helmet held in one hand. He had never seen this man before and he did not look like he was having a good day. Anger was written all over his face, making Castle feel anxious.

The man marched up to the barista, determined, although when he got there he said nothing only placing his helmet down on the counter.

"Can I help you?" the Rick asked apprehensively.

"Yeah," the man spat at him, "You can stop trying to sleep with my girlfriend."

Castle was taken aback, wondering what the hell he was talking about. Glimpsing around the store, he saw a few customers watching the exchange. Not wanting to make a scene, Castle simply smiled politely at the man.

"And who is your girlfriend exactly?" he questioned.

"Kate Beckett," stated the man, as if Castle should've already known that.

The barista nodded, finally understanding what was going on – it was Beckett's boyfriend... Ex-boyfriend, he reminded himself.

"You must be Josh," Castle reached out his hand, but Josh never shook it.

"That's right," the doctor replied crisply.

"Yeah, Beckett's mentioned you a few times," he sighed, "But last time I checked, you guys had broken up."

"Well, Coffee-boy, that's where you're wrong. Kate's just mad at me, it's just a phase," he spoke bitterly, fiddling with a stack of coffee lids on the counter, not making eye contact with the barista. "In fact, I was just going to go over there to apologize for this morning. You have no idea how much grief your little books have caused me."

Castle shrugged, unsure of how to respond.

"And," Josh continued, now leaving the lids alone and looking at the man stood in front of him, "I know you're in love with Kate."

Castle opened his mouth to explain but Josh put up his hand to stop him.

"No Rick, its fine honestly," Josh tried to aggravate the man, "I mean she's smart, sexy, what guy wouldn't want her?" he grinned. "But she's mine, not yours," the doctor's demeanour suddenly changing, "And I want you to stay away from her," he warned.

"Look, Josh, Beckett's been my friend for years now, I'm not about to let that go. And she's the one who's come to see _me_ every morning for the past few years, not the other way round. I can't ban her from Muse if she's done nothing wrong," said Castle forcefully, unwilling to lose Kate as friend. "Maybe you should just accept the fact that she's moved on."

"Moved on?" Josh laughed, gritting his teeth. "What are you talking about? We only broke up this morning."

Castle bit his tongue, he knew he would have to tell the man whether he liked it or not.

"Actually," he began, "She agreed to go out on a date with me, on Friday."

Out of nowhere, the doctor's fist rose up and collided with Castle's nose, causing blood to stream down his neck. Gasps of horror and shocked expressions appeared on the customers' faces as Josh went to hit him again. One or two tried to pull the man off of Castle and others called the police, alerting them of the situation.

Martha, hearing the commotion, rushed through the double doors only to see two customers attempting to restrain another from hurting her son any further. The man was panting heavily, as furious as a storm, and the customers holding him down on the ground looked up at Castle, asking him if we was alright.

Castle only nodded in response and wiped some of the blood off his face, leaving a dark red stain on his shirt. Martha was close to tears, having no idea why this man would attack her son. She ran up to the barista, enveloping him in a hug while he whispered reassurances in her ear, promising her that he was okay.

A moment later the cops burst in, ordering people to stay where they were. Josh was soon taken away in handcuffs and customers and staff gave witness statements describing what had happened. An ambulance arrived not long after to take Castle to the hospital, leaving Martha behind to shut up the shop and fetch Alexis.

They were just about to climb into a cab when across the street they saw Detective Beckett, fear present in her eyes. "Martha! Alexis!" she shouted running up to them, "Esposito called me saying that there had been an attack reported, are you all okay?" she asked, trying to remain calm.

Both women nodded silently, recognizably traumatized about the night's earlier events. Kate couldn't even describe the amount of panic she had felt since receiving the phone call. These people were her _family_, she would hate for anything to happen to _any_ of them.

But wait, where was Castle?

"Martha, where's Castle?" she questioned carefully, and she watched a tear fall from Alexis's eyes. "_Martha_?" the detective demanded, feeling her throat begin to close up. "_Please, God, don't let it be Castle," _she thought.

"He was attacked," Martha mumbled, fighting the urge to weep. "They took him to hospital a few minutes ago; we were going to go meet him," she gestured to the cab.

Kate's heart sunk, and her eyes fluttered close as she willed away the tears. No, she couldn't let them see her cry. Not like this.

"And, urm," the detective began, trying to stop her voice from wavering, "who did this to him?" she inquired, getting into detective mode.

However, the two red heads wouldn't meet her eyes, only stared sorrowfully at the cold, hard ground.

"Martha, _please_," she begged. She needed to know who would dare to hurt Castle. He was her _everything_. Without him she had no reason to get up every day; no happiness, no laughter, and no sanity. Without him she was broken, fractured in all heart, soul and mind.

"It was Josh," Alexis swallowed, "Your boyfriend."

No. _No_, it couldn't be. This was all her fault.

"Alexis, Martha, I'm _so_ sorry, I had no idea he would do anything like this. We only broke up this morning and I..."

"Wait, you and Josh broke up?" Alexis interrupted.

"Urm, yeah," replied Beckett, not very used to talking about her personal life so openly, "so that I could go out with your father," she explained.

All of a sudden Alexis ran into her arms, almost knocking the detective off of her feet. At first she was startled by the embrace, but soon relaxed into it, enjoying the warmth from the cold.

"Please tell me you asked my dad out," Alexis murmured into Kate's shoulder.

"Actually he asked me out," she grinned at the memory of their conversation earlier today.

"And you said yes?" Alexis questioned, leaning back to watch the detective's response.

"Yes," she smiled.

"Finally!" she shouted, squeezing Kate harder, "It only took you guys 8 freaking years."

Beckett laughed, "Yeah, sorry about that."

"Doesn't matter now," Alexis giggled, letting go of the detective, "I'm so happy."

"We both are Darling," mentioned Martha.

"So, when was your first date going to be?" she asked excitedly.

"Friday," Kate beamed, "Although, depending on Castle's condition I'm not sure of when it's going to be now," she spoke sadly. "We should probably go see him," the detective suggested.

The other two women nodded in agreement and they all hopped into a cab, directing it to the hospital. A couple of hours later they were reunited with Castle and he was sent home with a few minor stitches and bruises. Luckily it was nothing that time wouldn't heal.

Beckett agreed to return to Muse with Castle after he pleaded her to for almost ten minutes straight, but truth be told, she really wanted to check that he got home okay anyway.

They soon arrived back to Martha's apartment and Martha and Alexis retired to their bedrooms, allowing Castle and Beckett to have some alone time. It had been clear that the pair needed some space to speak ever since they had met Castle in the hospital, even if it was just to reaffirm that Friday was still on. Alexis just hoped that Josh's _"little incident"_ wouldn't ruin the couple's relationship before they had even got a chance to begin.

Now alone, Castle and Beckett stood awkwardly in the living room, both wanting to say so much to each other yet both having no idea how to express them. Castle eventually cut the silence by asking Beckett if she'd like to sit down and he sat a little way away from her on the couch in order to make her feel more comfortable, despite his feelings.

"It's been a long time since I've been up here," she murmured thoughtfully, thinking about the many movie nights and dinners that she had been invited to by Castle and his family over the years.

Castle shrugged, "I know," he mumbled wistfully, "Too long." And they fell back into silence.

"I just want to apologize for today," Kate started, attempting to get the conversation flowing. "I had no idea Josh would do anything like that, I'm so sorry he hurt you."

"Beckett, it's okay," he promised. "It's not your fault, you didn't know."

"I just feel so stupid," she muttered.

"Hey," Castle whispered, squeezing her hand next to his, "don't. Josh should feel stupid, not you."

"I know," she sighed, "I know," and she squeezed his hand back.

"Kate?"

"Hmm?" she looked at him.

He swallowed concerned, playing with Beckett's fingers, contemplating the effect of the question he was about to ask, "Josh has never... hurt you, has he?"

"No," she assured him, "Never."

"Sorry, after today I- I just needed to make sure," Castle would never forgive himself if something happened to her.

"It's okay Castle," Kate smiled, "I don't mind you asking... Are we still okay for Friday?" she asked nervously.

"Yeah, sure, of course," he grinned. Nothing would stop him from finally having this date with Beckett. _Nothing_.

"Good," she didn't want him to have second thoughts about her now, "I should probably get going," the detective sighed tiredly, getting up off the couch, "I have to go to work in the morning."

"Stay," Castle burst out instantly, as if it were a reflex. He didn't even know he was about to say it but now Kate was looking at him uneasily. He was worried he had pushed too hard. "It's late," the barista explained, "You could just stay here."

"There's nowhere to sleep here, Castle. You're already in the spare bedroom and I really don't feel like sleeping on the couch."

"Then I'll sleep on the couch," he offered.

"Castle, you were just in hospital," he was being ridiculous. Did he really want her to stay so much?

"I really can't win with you, can I?" Castle laughed and she shook her head with amusement.

"Fine then," he grinned, "You can just sleep with me," and Beckett opened her mouth to object. "Not like that," Castle professed quickly, "Just share a bed. With me," he elaborated.

"Castle, none of my stuff is here."

"Then you can borrow something to sleep in and go home and get changed in the morning, after I give you your coffee, of course," he said as if it were obvious. "Come on, Kate. I know you're tired," the barista gleamed.

It was a very enticing proposal, and she really didn't want to go all the way home and face the darkness of an empty apartment.

"Fine," she gave in finally. He wasn't going to stop otherwise. "But no funny business," she looked at him.

"Detective, I assure you my intensions are pure," he mocked.

"Uh huh, sure," Kate smirked, leading the way to his bedroom before she could give it another thought.

It was a small room with red painted walls and a small wooden desk and chair placed at the end of a big double bed (which pretty much took up the space of the whole room) with Castle's laptop placed on it. There was a walk-in wardrobe by the bed, but no en suite bathroom, although there was one opposite the room. Castle disappeared into the closet and pulled out a large white shirt for Beckett to wear and then found some pyjamas for him. The detective went to change in the bathroom, and Castle in the bedroom.

A minute later Beckett knocked on the door and the barista shouted, "Come in," realizing just then now short his shirt was on her. It stopped mid-thigh and he gazed, heart beating loudly in his chest, at her long legs as she stood shyly in the doorway, knowing full well that he was staring at her (but she didn't mind - it simply meant that she could take a moment to _appreciate_ the black v-neck shirt he was wearing, teasing her with a nice glimpse of his chest). However she was only wearing underwear under his shirt; this was going to be much harder than he had anticipated.

Without another word, the detective walked across the room and settled under the covers and Castle followed soon after, shutting off the light and getting in the side closest to the wardrobe, whispering, "Goodnight," to one another.

At first it was uncomfortable, both of them unsure of what to do with their bodies and of how close they could get without breaking too many boundaries, so they lay silently side by side for a while. Giving up with that idea minutes later, Kate moved closer to the barista and he wrapped his arms around her, the detective burying her head into his shoulder.

They were so close, skin touching skin, simply surrounded by each other. She could feel the warmth of his hands through her (his?) shirt and Beckett hummed a small sound of content and Castle watched her slowly drift off to sleep.

This was it: pure peace, happiness, safety. Neither of them had felt safer in years until this moment, both able to be vulnerable with each other, care for each other. It was clear now – she was his soul mate.

Castle dropped a gentle kiss on the detective's shoulder which was placed under his chin, and soon after he also fell asleep. He only wished he could fall asleep holding her every night.

* * *

**A/N:** okay so Josh was kinda a bigger jackass in this than in the show but we have seen that he has an aggressive(ish) side to him, after all he did push Castle into a wall and shout at him... Poor Castle

P.S. Josh sucks.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N:** I just dropped my phone in a toilet but here's a new chapter. **X Verity.**

* * *

Singing hey mama, don't want no drama  
Just a kiss before I leave  
Hey lady, don't say maybe  
You're the one that I can believe

Hey lover, don't want no other  
finger for my ring

Hey mama, hey hey mama

* * *

Castle woke up in a daze, at first confused as to why he could feel the presence of someone else in his bed. Wiping the sleep from his eyes, he looked up remembering the events of yesterday evening.

His body still hurt from Josh's painful blows and Castle shuddered, reliving the terror etched on his mother's face as she watched the blood stream down his shirt. He was only glad that Alexis wasn't there to witness it.

And then there was Kate.

Kate who sprinted to Muse the _second_ she had heard about the attack; Kate who had come with _his family_ to the hospital to see him; Kate who had _agreed_ to stay last night and was still asleep beside him.

Castle gently rolled over off of his stomach and onto his side so that he could watch the detective, careful not to disturb her. She was now facing away from him, her wavy hair splayed out across the bed and the sunlight from the window dancing off of her soft skin. She appeared so calm, so peaceful in her slumber. It was hard to imagine that this was Detective Beckett, the woman who stared down murderers on a daily basis as if it were nothing.

More often than he'd care to admit, the barista had been unable to sleep due to worry of her. He would hear sirens in the night and picture the horrifying people, and circumstances, that she would have to deal with. Many times he had thought about calling her, desired to get rid of the fear building inside his chest. After all he was a part time writer; it wasn't hard for him to imagine the worst case scenario.

Whenever Kate disappeared for a few days, then the nightmares began to begin. He would find her body found dead in an alley, shot and killed in the streets, stabbed while working a case – Castle had envisioned then all. He used to shrug them off, pretending that it was only because of her dangerous job, but he soon realized that it was much more than that. It was love.

And when Richard Castle loved someone, be it his mother, daughter or muse, then he would want to protect them. It was simply an instinctive urge that he could not deny. Yes, perhaps he was a little _over protective_, but it was only because he cared. If anything happened to anyone of them, he wouldn't be able to cope.

The first time Beckett had introduced him to Ryan and Esposito, they assured him that they would take good care of her. They could both practically see the worry in Castle's eyes when she joked about a deadly drug dealer they had just arrested. Although the story was amusing, he didn't like to think about Kate being in the crosshairs. He preferred her to safe and relaxed; just as she was right now, in his bed.

The barista gazed at her for a couple of moments more, knowing that soon his alarm would go off on the nightstand and he would have to get dressed for work. He didn't want this to end. He wanted to wake up every morning next to Kate Beckett, to see a smile on her face, to make her laugh again and again. But that wouldn't happen for a while, he expected. They hadn't even gone on their first date yet, never mind _sleeping together. _However, if Castle had it his way, he would let her move in tomorrow (but he doubted she would say yes).

Beckett began to stir, inhaling deeply and groaning at the sunlight. Opening her eyes a fraction; she turned over, now facing towards the barista. Castle didn't move. He didn't want her to wake up completely yet, not when it was so early. But as soon as she snuggled back into her pillow, the detective popped open her right eye only to see Richard Castle watching her.

"Castle, staring is creepy," she mumbled.

Damn, she caught him. "Yes, I know, sorry," he replied quickly, earning a laugh.

"Why are you awake so early?" the detective asked peering at the clock on the nightstand.

"Well, you know, coffee to brew, cakes to bake," he explained.

"But this is even earlier than I get up Castle. It's 5:30! And I thought my job was exhausting."

"As true as that may be Detective, I don't have to chase after bad guys all day."

"Touché," Kate muttered, pulling the duvet over her head and Castle grinned at her. Was she always this adorable in the morning?

"How's your face?" the detective inquired, still hidden under the blankets.

"Okay," he muttered, touching his face carefully, checking for bruises. "Does it look okay?" he asked, wondering if there was any swelling.

Beckett pulled the covers back in order to see him and gazed up at him. "You look fine, just a few bruises to the side of your face, and obviously I can see the stitches under your chin. But normally you wouldn't be able to see them," she shrugged.

"Good," he grinned, "I don't want to start scaring off customers. I bet I look like a badass."

Kate snorted, "Yeah sure you do."

"What?" smirked Castle, "Can't say you've never had a thing for the bad boys, huh Kate?"

"No comment. But if you must know, I did go through a bit of a 'wild child' phase when I was a teenager," she said sitting up to join him.

"Really? Got any pictures?"

She rolled her eyes, "None that I'll be showing you."

"Killjoy," he muttered, smiling and Beckett laughed again. "Do you want some eggs and bacon before you leave?" Castle offered.

"Urm, yes please," she spoke unsurely. "I mean, if it's okay with you."

"Of course it's okay. Come on," he gestured to the kitchen, "I'll make us some coffee."

Following Castle through the apartment, Beckett only hoped that neither Alexis nor Martha would be awake to see them like this. They were both grinning like idiots having shared a bed last night - she was only wearing his shirt and underwear, and they were both giggling over making breakfast together. It didn't take a detective to think that a little more than _sleeping_ had gone on last night, even though it hadn't.

Kate kept trying to remind herself that last night wasn't supposed to mean anything other than two grown-ups sharing a bed together, but it meant more to her than that. It meant that she could let her guard down around him, that she could let him in. She had felt more content in his arms last night that she ever had before. She felt safe, protected, _loved_. Despite neither of them saying the 'l' word yet, she knew now that he loved her. Kate only had to gaze into his eyes to see the depth of his love for, she only hoped that he could see it in her eyes too.

"Kate, are you okay?" Castle asked concerned. He must've been talking to her.

"Yeah, sorry. I must've been daydreaming," she murmured shyly.

"I was just asking if you wanted white or brown bread."

"Oh, urm, white please," and he hummed in acknowledgement.

"Darling!" Martha shouted from the dining room, "Have you seen my purse? I swear I just left it in..." she strode into the kitchen, "here yesterday..." The red head gave a quizzical look between her son and the detective and back to Castle again. He was still in his pyjamas and it seemed that Kate was wearing nothing but his shirt.

"Martha," Beckett started, stepping forward, "I'm sorry I didn't mean to intrude. I just..."

"Oh Darling relax. I'm hardly the one to judge," she grinned.

"Mother, nothing happened."

"Sure it didn't, with you two smiling like that. You might as well sing it from the rooftops."

"Seriously Mother, _nothing happened_."

"Right..." she laughed. Of course she wouldn't believe them. "So, what's for breakfast?"

* * *

By 6:30am, Kate left Castle to go home and get changed before going to work. He wished her goodbye with a loving kiss on the cheek, looking forward to seeing her again tomorrow.

The day went fast for both of them, with Castle getting a rush of customers and Beckett getting a new case. All day Castle was excited to finally get his hands on the manuscript he gave Beckett. He needed to know all her honest thoughts throughout 'Heat Wave' in order to make it as great as possible before sending it to his publisher.

After locking up the store and eating dinner with his family, Castle rushed to his bedroom and sat down at his desk. Opening his laptop, he fished the manuscript out of the top right drawer and flicked open the novel, grinning at the first comment of, "What kind a name is Nikki Heat? – It sounds like a stripper name!" He knew she wouldn't like it, but that was part of the fun. Pulling her pigtails was part of his job.

The barista continued to read through her notes, treading carefully around Chapter 3 where the tragedy surrounding Nikki's history is first described. Thankfully Kate didn't write anything bad about this section, only drew a sad face and then scribbled down the Latin words "vincit omnis veritas" – truth conquers all. He knew Kate was big on symbolism so he would have to ask Beckett what those words meant to her. They would have to be important for her to write them like that.

In Chapter 6, where Nikki Heat was ironing naked, Beckett (of course) wrote: "Who the hell irons naked, Castle?" She wasn't wrong but it just made the book... sexier. Plus just thinking about Beckett naked...

Nope. No. Now was not the time. Now was the time for editing 'Heat Wave', not for fantasizing.

Her comments in the scene where Nikki and Rook (finally) got together also made him laugh. Such things as, "You made our characters get together doing body shots? Really?" and when Nikki guided Rook's hand to touch her breast Beckett wrote, "You thinking about touching my boobs, Castle?", then drew a winky face.

He was glad that she was taking it light heartedly rather than panicking about the meaning. Yes he was in love with her, but for him it wasn't all about sex. It was about more than that: about spending the rest of your life with the love of your life, waking up every morning to your soul-mate, trusting someone completely with everything. Simply being in love.

And he had already found the girl of his dreams. He would really have to show her how much she means to him on their date; make sure that it's perfect for her. He has to remember, this isn't any old girl - this is _Kate Beckett_. She's unlike any girl he's ever met before. She's strong and smart and sexy beyond belief; he _never_ wants to let her go.

Skimming over the pages, he repeatedly corrects any typos made or any sentences she thought didn't sound quite right. Unsurprisingly Beckett had worked out who the killer was by Chapter 17, just as she usually did. On the last page of the novel, Nikki and Rook kissed in the rain and Kate wrote "Oh la la", making him smile. He really needs to remember to kiss Beckett in the rain one day...

Castle shut down his laptop and put the manuscript away, glancing at his watch. Was it seriously 1am already? Wow, he really did lose time when writing.

He dragged himself away from the desk, stumbling towards the bed and into his pyjamas. Pulling back the covers, the barista thought back to last night, getting into bed next to Kate, her curling into him. Suddenly the room seemed much emptier, lonely. He missed her presence already and they had only spent _one_ night together. He really was screwed, wasn't he?

Castle slipped into the bed; feeling uncomfortable without Beckett being there. He wondered what she was doing in that moment. She was probably already asleep; it was late, after all. He wished he was with her.

* * *

Alone in her bed, Kate laid there unable to sleep. She looked at the clock: 1am. Why couldn't she sleep?

After spending last night with Castle, it seemed odd to be in her own bed again. She wished she was beside him, wished that he would hold her like he did yesterday. It made her feel so... _amazing_. She missed him.

Giving up, Beckett wandered to her bookshelf, picking up 'Flowers for Your Grave' as she gazed at the first manuscript Castle had ever given her – he always gave her manuscript back once he was done editing the novel. It was the book which had made her fall in love with him. How he wrote, his understanding of the victims; his words touched her in a way in which she couldn't describe.

Yes, it _wasn't_ the best novel he'd ever written, but to Kate it meant everything. It was the real affirmation of their friendship: she needed books and he needed an audience. But now that relationship had developed into her needing to be understood and him needing a muse. They needed each other now, more than ever.

The detective cradled the manuscript to her chest and carried it back to her bed. She opened the first page, running her hands over Castle's words, her notes still present in the margins. Remembering now that he had now written a book about her, Kate's heart fluttered in her chest.

Thinking of the way he wrote about her: he thought she was incredible. Only, she wasn't. She wasn't a superhero; she was just Kate – the girl from the coffee store. But despite showing her strengths, Castle also described her weaknesses. Beckett thought it would make her feel vulnerable to know that he could figure her out so easily, but surprisingly it didn't. It made her feel happy. No longer did that wall have to stay up. He knew her, all of her. And she might just love him too.

* * *

**A/N:** yup, I did work off the real Heat Wave for this one. But seriously, who the hell irons naked?


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N:** in a magical world, where all writers are cafe/restaurant owners, Castle finally goes on a date with Beckett... (I can hear your excitement, don't lie).

* * *

Bubblegum, lipstick  
Baby's got me nervous  
Something's got a hold of my feet  
You just wanna go  
Where your problems won't follow  
Baby that's okay with me

Set fire with just a little spark  
That's how it goes when you're  
Moving in the dark

* * *

The next couple of days passed quickly; and before Castle and Beckett knew it, it was Friday. Castle had spoken to Beckett that morning (as usual) saying how much he was looking forward to that evening. Both Alexis and his mother had given him some advice on where to take Beckett on their date, and in the end he decided on Italian. Everyone likes Italian, right?

He had spent _hours_ trying to think of the perfect place to take her and eventually he found it. She was going to love this.

Alexis helped him get ready, handing him a red tie to go with his navy-black shirt rather than the blue one he was intending on wearing. And at 8pm sharp as promised, Castle knocked on Kate's door with a dozen roses in hand.

"Just a second," came the muffled shout of Beckett through the door. She was probably doing the finishing touches of her make-up, knowing her.

Kate slid open the door dressed in a long black dress with dark lace covering the bodice and sleeves of it. Castle's jaw dropped, stunned in amazement of how beautiful she looked, meanwhile Beckett took the moment to drift her eyes over his cotton shirt, smiling at how his red tie matched her ruby red lipstick.

"You clean up nice Detective," Castle finally said after staring at her too long to be considered socially acceptable.

"You're not so bad yourself, Castle," she hummed shyly as he handed her the roses. Beckett swiftly grabbed a vase, filled it with water, and put the roses in it before returning to Castle by the door.

"Are you ready to go?" he asked.

"One second, let me just grab my purse," she smiled. "You can come in if you like," she spoke after watching Castle stand awkwardly in the doorway as she walked away to her bedroom.

The barista had never seen Beckett's place before. Although they had been friends for years, it seemed that she had always gone to his place rather than the other way around. Her apartment was something that he could only describe as _Beckett_, with little knickknacks decorating the shelves, a large Alex Gross painting hung up in the sitting room and countless books spread around the room; this was _definitely_ Beckett's place. It was very bohemian styled, and Castle imagined that this space spun stories of what Kate was like before her mother died - he felt honoured to see it.

Strolling over to her bookshelf, Castle noticed that Kate still owned all his manuscripts, and they appeared pretty worn too. The barista smiled to himself, glad that she enjoyed his work so much. He would write forever as long as she kept reading them. She gave his novels purpose and inspired him to write better. Without Beckett there were no books, otherwise he would've given up a long time ago.

Kate ambled back to the living room, self-consciously fiddling with her dress as she walked. Was she really about to go on a date with Richard Castle? It felt unreal. All this time spent waiting to dive into this relationship together and here they were – finally ready to make the plunge.

She stopped in the entrance of the room, observing Castle looking through her bookshelf. Kate couldn't help but smile; of course he would be the kind of guy to scour through her stuff. Coughing loudly to put a stop to the barista's nosing about, Castle turned to face her.

Shit... How long had she been there?

"I urm, I..." Castle began, hurriedly trying to explain.

"Come on, Castle. Are you going to take out me to dinner or not?" she smirked strutting out the front door.

Dropping a book he was holding, the barista followed her without a second thought. At least she wasn't mad... He didn't think she was, anyway.

"So," Kate started as she finished locking the door, "where are we going?"

"Ah, my dear Detective, it's a surprise."

"Still? Come on Castle, please," she fluttered her eyelashes at him.

"Fine, I will give you this one clue and this one clue only: we're going for Italian."

"Italian?"

Uh oh, "That's not a problem is it? I mean, I thought everyone liked Italian. If you don't like it we can go somewhere else, its okay," he replied hastily. He couldn't screw this up. He couldn't.

"Castle," she spoke calmly, resting a palm on his forearm, "I love Italian, relax," Kate smiled gently.

"I know," he sighed averting his eyes. "...I just want this to be perfect for you."

Kate sucked in a breath. How was he so sweet? She wanted to kiss him right there and then. "Castle, wouldn't care if this date was in a horrible old diner surrounded by people who smell like my murder victim, okay? As long as I'm with you, it's already perfect," she told him timidly. She meant it, every word.

She was amazing. Kate Beckett was amazing. "Well I guess it's good that we're not going to an old diner with people who smell like your murder victim then," he muttered, grinning.

"Yeah it is," she laughed.

"So, Kate Beckett, can I buy you dinner?" he inquired, offering her his hand.

"I thought you'd never ask," she beamed, wrapping her fingers around his.

Castle led them both downstairs and got into a cab. As Castle held the door open for her and she stepped inside, Kate subtly overheard him requesting the cab driver to take them to 'ZiZi's', a restaurant she'd never heard of.

Before long, the yellow vehicle rolled to a halt and they both climbed out. Taking Kate's arm once again, the couple strode into the restaurant which was already buzzing with people. It was a small establishment with white walls, comfy booths and cream coloured chairs. At the back of the room the word 'ZiZi's' was painted in large, deep-green letters, and just below it was a door leading to the kitchen.

"Dinner for two?" asked the waiter in a strong Italian accent. He was tall and thin, had a small moustache and wrote a green bowtie with his suit.

"Yes," Castle grinned as he glanced over at Beckett.

"And you have a reservation?" the waiter questioned.

"Yes, it's under Richard Castle," Castle winked.

"Just one moment, Sir," spoke the waiter as he went off in search of some menus.

"Castle, this place looks amazing. Thank you," Kate grinned, squeezing his hand as the waiter returned.

"Right this way," the waiter signalled the pair to follow him. He was taking them to a small wooden staircase hidden in the back corner of the room which Beckett didn't even notice at first. Castle looked at her, wiggling his eyebrows – he clearly had something planned.

Upstairs was much quieter, with only a few people scattered around the room. Kate almost fell over with amazement as she saw the huge oak tree growing from the centre of the floor, its branches reaching to the furthest corners of the ceiling and brightened with tiny, golden fairy lights sitting amongst the leaves.

The waiter guided them to a booth in the corner and Castle suggested that Beckett sit in the side facing the tree. The waiter, who announced that his name was "Luigi", handed them their menus.

"Castle," Beckett breathed looking up from her menu, "How did you find this place?"

"My old friend Michael Connelly opened this place up a few months ago. He's been telling me to come here for a while now, I thought we could try it out," he grinned.

"But Castle, this place is amazing! I can't believe it took you so long to come here." It really was a stunning place.

"I guess I was just waiting for the right person to bring with me," Castle gazed at her and she gazed back, both lost in each other's eyes until Castle heard a loud cough behind them.

"Any wine for the two of you?" Luigi asked, interrupting them.

"We'll take the Merlot please," Castle smiled after a brief look at the wine list.

"Of course, Sir," and Luigi disappeared again, his nose stuck in the air.

"So," Beckett began, "do you do this a lot? Dating, I mean."

"Urm, no. Not since... Gina," he sighed.

"I'm sorry Castle, I didn't mean to..."

"Kate, it's okay. But I think one day... One day soon we'll have to talk about Gina, but not today. Not on our first date."

Beckett nodded. She knew they would have to talk about it sooner or later. With her more frequent withdrawals from Muse and Castle unable to understand what he did wrong, those were dark times for the both of them.

Luigi disrupted both their reflections on the subject of Gina by dropping some bread on the table. "Excuse me Sir, Ma'am; what would you like to eat?" he questioned, pouring their wine, getting the barista to taste and approve it first.

Castle glanced over at Beckett, looking just as clueless as he felt. They had hardly even looked at their menus yet.

"What would you recommend?" the detective asked, shrugging.

"One moment please," spoke Luigi, "let me go get Mario, the head chef. He is an expert at the menu," and he ran off.

"Kate," Castle whispered, "Please tell me you know the videogame 'Super Mario Bros'."

"You mean the game with the two Italian brothers called Mario and Luigi who have to rescue the princess?" Kate wondered.

"That's the one... Am I the only one seeing what's going on here?" he inquired.

Luigi coughed again, forcing Castle to look up at him, angrily and so Luigi gave a slight, polite smile in return. "Sir and Ma'am; this is Mario. He will be your chef for this evening," said Luigi, introducing a much shorter, rounder man wearing a red chef's hat.

"Now that's just uncanny," Castle muttered to Beckett.

"Ah, Mr Castle! It is an honour to finally meet you," and the two men shook hands. "Connelly has been telling for weeks how you're the best barista in New York."

Castle chuckled with Mario, "Yes, that's what many like to think," and the barista glanced over at Beckett only to watch her roll her eyes at him.

"And who is this little lady?" Mario inquired.

"Detective Kate Beckett," she announced, shaking hands with the man.

"Ah, New York's finest I gather. Connelly said you spoke about her a great deal," Mario beamed, turning to Castle, "she must be very special to you," and the barista looked at Kate lovingly as she blushed.

"And such a beautiful woman too," Mario continued. "You should watch out for those, Mr Castle. They can be a handful. I would know," the chef laughed, "the last one I met I married! And I have never been happier since meeting Peach," he sighed, thinking of his wife. "Anyway, Luigi told me you were having difficulties deciding what to eat. May I recommend the Insalata di Capra for starters; the Fettuccine con Polpette for main and the vanilla Creme Brulée for dessert?"

Castle and Beckett looked at each other, nodding. "Looks like we'll both have that, Mario please," replied the barista.

"Very good. Sir, Ma'am, it was a pleasure meeting you both," said Mario before he returned to the kitchen.

"Did you hear that?" questioned Castle in a hushed tone, "Mario is married to Princess Peach!"

Kate rolled her eyes (she really did do that a lot around Castle, didn't she?), "Relax Castle, I'm sure it's just a coincidence."

"Coincidence? Beckett! ...I bet he has a pet dinosaur called Yoshi too," he speculated.

"Yes Castle, and I also bet that King Bower is going to come right up those stairs, kidnap me and make you defeat him before getting me back."

Castle bit into a piece of bread, "Don't jinx it," he murmured, chewing the bread violently. "Wait, you know video games?"

"Of course," she smirked nonchalantly, also grabbing a piece of bread.

"Do you mind if I write that down quickly? On my phone? You know, for Nikki Heat."

"You're - you're writing another one?" Beckett questioned. She thought it was only a one-off thing.

"Right... About that... I've already written two more..."

"Castle?! You did what?! When were you going to tell me?" she demanded.

"I'm sorry; I just wanted to see how well you took 'Heat Wave' first before telling you about the others. I'm _so_ sorry," he apologized.

"Is that why there was such a long gap between your last Derrick Storm novel and Nikki Heat?"

"Yes," he spoke honestly.

"You were worried about my reaction?" it was a question, although it sounded more like a statement.

Castle nodded sadly, "Yes, I didn't want you to leave." Castle took a deep breath, "Kate I know what I'm about to say might scare you, but I can't write without you anymore."

Beckett's brow furrowed, "What do you mean?"

"I mean, all those times you disappear, whether it be because of work or personal reasons, I _can't_ write," he explained. "Without talking to you, seeing your smile, making you laugh, I can't write. I just can't. Call it writers block, call it what you want... but you inspire me, Kate. You inspire me," he stopped suddenly. Thinking of all the times Kate left him made him emotional. He would lie on his bed for hours in the night wondering, _"Is this the time she'll never come back?"_

"I didn't want you to leave," Castle repeated his voice wavering slightly; "I can't lose you," he whispered.

"Hey, Castle," Kate spoke softly, rubbing small circles on the back of his hand, "I'm not going anywhere. I promise you," she swore. "Yes, I was a little bit... apprehensive about Nikki Heat, but I love your books too much to care. 'Heat Wave' was incredible and I really want to read the others too."

"You do?" he asked looking up into her eyes to see if she was serious.

"Yes," she assured him. Then after thinking for a moment she asked, "Did you ever send 'Heat Wave' to your publisher?"

Castle shook his head, "No, not yet. I was thinking about it, but I wanted to ask you for permission first, you being the inspiration and all."

Kate smiled, squeezing his hand. "Promise me you'll do it on Monday?"

"Promise," he squeezed back, watching as Luigi brought their food. They both began to dig into their meals, unable to get the massive grins off their faces because they were finally doing this. They were dating. From this moment on Castle knew that he didn't want to go on another date with anyone else except Beckett – she was his one and done.

* * *

**A/N:** right I know there was a lot of dialogue there, but they're on their first date, they have to talk! This is the first half of Caskett's date (awww) so there; you've got something to look forward to. Also, I could not help but do that whole Mario thing because honestly, when am I going to have the chance to write something like that again?

For all you cool people who are interested, ZiZi (as I called it) is based off a real restaurant called ZAZA in a small town called Berkhamsted in the UK. And yes, there really is a huge tree on the top floor with fairy lights in it (I totally did not spend like an hour trying to figure out if it was real or not). **X Verity.**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N:** the chapter you've all been waiting for...

* * *

You make me happy, whether you know it or not  
We should be happy, that's what I said from the start  
I am so happy  
Knowin' you are the one that I want for the rest of my days  
For the rest of my days

I'm happy knowin' that you are mine  
The grass is greener on the other side  
The more I think the more I wish that we could lay here for hours and just reminisce  
Ooh-ooh

* * *

They ate their meal happily, smiling in delight at being together. Time seemed to pass in a flash and before they knew it they were finishing up dessert.

"That was amazing," Beckett grinned, watching the barista sat opposite her.

"Yeah it was," he replied, curling his fingers around Kate's. "And don't think you're paying, I've got this one," Castle told her.

"Are you sure?" she asked. "Not even half?"

"Kate, I'm sure," he spoke sincerely and she nodded, "Okay."

Luigi soon appeared with the bill, Castle dropping his credit card on top. They left the restaurant moments later and stood on the street looking at one another.

"So," Kate began, "What now?"

"That's up to you. We can go dancing or for a walk or to a bar... Or I can take you home," Castle spoke the last one sadly. "Your choice," he shrugged.

"Take a walk?" she suggested, "It's a nice evening."

They wandered hand in hand to the nearest park, their only light radiating from the full moon that shone above them joined with light from the shops which they strode past. The evening was cool and Beckett shuffled closer to Castle for warmth as they walked, wrapping his arm round her to keep her close to his chest.

The couple found a bench in the sheltered under a tree and illuminated by a street lamp, and sat they down together. The two of them didn't say anything, simply surrounded by each other- they didn't need any words. The two couldn't describe how much love they felt towards one another and so they sat quietly, blissfully.

"Kate," Castle whispered, causing her to glance up at him. She loved when he called her by her first name, it made her heart beat faster every time he did. The barista's deep blue eyes were filled with intensity and love. Kate saw the words stick in his throat and he swallowed hard, focusing on what he was about to say. She gave him a small nudge of encouragement and he squeezed her hand softly.

"Kate," he started again, timidly, "I just want to say that this evening with you have been one of the best evenings I've ever had, even though it's only our first date," and she smiled at his words. "And I would really love it if you would like to go out with me again," he spoke nervously.

"Of course Castle," Kate said instantly. "I would love to."

The barista grinned at her response, lifting his hand and cupping her cheek. He brought his face slowly next to hers, their noses now side by side. Kate's eyes fluttered closed, as did Castle's and their lips met for the first time.

The kiss was gentle and unhurried. Beckett let out a moan before he deepened the kiss, bringing the pair closer than they had ever been before.

Eventually, they withdrew from each other, breaking for air. Their foreheads still touching, Castle and Beckett gazed into each other's eyes, blue meeting green once again.

"I love you Kate," he murmured as she felt his words touch her skin against the cold. "I love you so much," and he kissed her deeply again.

Breaking apart, Kate ran a hand down his face and instinctively he leaned into her touch.

"Castle," she spoke, her voice thick with lust, "You have no idea how long I've waited to hear you say those words."

"I love you Kate. I love you," he repeated again.

"I love you too," she uttered and Castle's eyes went wide. _She loved him._

Castle cupped her head, feeling her soft hair in his hands, giving her another kiss, and another, and another...

Hands were flying everywhere, each desperate for each other's touch: hands, faces, backs, they were all over each other. The detective laughed; she knew the attraction between them was strong, but she didn't realize it would be _this_ strong.

"Castle," she whispered. "I don't usually do this on a first date," she smiled shyly, "but do you want to take this back to my place?"

The barista's heart soared, "Yes," he grinned, "Yes."

Kate grasped his hand, standing up from the bench on wobbly legs. She led him to the main road where they grabbed a taxi, directing it to Beckett's place.

Despite getting a little _handsy_ in the cab, the couple burst through her front door, laughing and giggling, pressing small kisses to each other's skin, wrapped in a cloak of lust and longing. She guided him to her bedroom and lay on the bed as he jumped on to join her.

He kissed her mouth, her neck, her hands; any part where he could feel his skin against hers.

"Wait," Beckett stopped him, "Don't you need to tell Alexis and Martha where you are?"

"No, its okay," he assured her, "I texted them in the taxi," and Beckett hummed in response, her body buzzing.

The detective took hold of his tie; bring him towards her, peppering kisses along her jaw line. His hands scraped down her body, making her breath catch in her throat.

"Castle," she breathed, arching her back, "I want you. I want you."

He ran a hand through her hair. Looking into her eyes, he saw she wanted this as much as he did. He dropped a kiss on her temple before pulling down the zipper on her dress. Castle had never been happier in his life.

* * *

The next morning Castle was still dozing next to Kate as she watched him. It seemed like a dream, a spectacular dream, no less. It was incredible. _They_ were incredible. Not only was it the best sex of her life, but she loved him with her full heart. She never wanted to let him go.

He lay on his back, only a sheet covering their still naked bodies as she lay on her front observing the gentle rise and fall of his chest. Kate was going to have to wake him up soon. It was almost 9 o'clock. She had no idea if he was supposed to be at work today or not, meanwhile it was her day off.

She moved next to the barista and caressed his face with the palm of her hand.

"Castle," she whispered. No reply. "Castle," she nudged him.

"Hmm. Don't get up yet, stay in bed," came the murmured reply.

"Castle," she gave him a larger shove, forcing his eyes open.

The moment he saw Beckett, his face broke into a grin; simply seeing her next to him in the morning made him so unbelievably giddy. "Hey," he muttered.

"Hey yourself," she smiled. "Sorry to wake you but I wasn't sure if you were supposed to be at work."

Castle shook his head, "No, not today. Mother gave me the day off."

"Good," she beamed, "because it's my day off too."

"So what would you like to do today?" he asked.

"Um, I don't know. We could read," she gave a suggestive smile.

"We could watch TV," Castle added.

"Yeah, we could get something to eat."

"We could do that, yeah," he grinned as Beckett leaned forward to kiss him, only to be interrupted by the ringing of his phone.

Glancing at the caller ID the barista saw that it was Alexis. "I, urm, I better get that," he said, giving an apologetic smile and pulling on some boxers as he left the room.

Beckett knew that Alexis would always be Castle's main priority, and honestly the way he was such a good father was one of the many things that attracted Kate to him. With his daughter, Castle showed how caring and understanding he was and the detective would never ask for him to put herself before Alexis. He was sweet and generous and kind. He was the love of her life, and she wouldn't have him any other way.

Seconds later, Castle returned with a frown on his face.

"Everything okay?" Kate questioned.

"Something's gone wrong at Muse," he explained. "The delivery people brought the wrong ingredients."

"You need to go?" she inquired sadly, although she already knew the answer.

"Kate I'm so sorry," he sat on the bed next to her. "I will make this up to you," Castle promised.

"Come back for lunch?" she asked. She really didn't want him to go so soon.

"Deal," he smiled, kissing her lips. "I love you," he whispered in her ear before turning to go.

"I love you too!" she yelled as he walked out the front door and then she melted back into her bed. _He was amazing._

* * *

At 12 o'clock Castle returned with flowers in hand. He knocked in the door and Beckett swung it open dressed casually in jeans and a blue shirt.

"Hey Castle," she smiled looking shyly and the flowers. They were bright purple with hints of yellow it them – her two favourite colours.

"These are for you as part of my 'making it up to you'," he grinned, handing out the flowers to her.

"Thanks Castle," she murmured, dipping her head slightly and smelling the bouquet. "That's really sweet of you. Come on in," Kate spoke, moving away from the door to let him in.

"Did you fix the delivery in the end?" she asked grabbing another vase, just as she had the night before.

"Yeah all fixed now," he assured her. "Kate, I really am sorry about this morning. I shouldn't have left..."

"Castle, it's fine," she promised. "Your family needed you and I would never ask you to put me before them."

The barista stared at her in amazement, "You really are something special Kate, d'you know that?"

"I do now," she smirked. "Come on, you can help me make lunch," and she tugged on his hand to join her in the kitchen.

The pair worked side by side preparing the meal, giggling and flirting with each other. Castle was in charge of vegetables and Kate was cooking the chicken and potatoes. And soon it was all done and they sat at the dining room table.

"I didn't know you could cook so well," Castle smiled taking his first bite. "I thought you said you usually get take out."

"I do," she shrugged. "You should see the Styrofoam temple going on in the fridge. I went out and brought all this while you were gone."

"Kate, you didn't have to."

"Yes, I did," but before he could ask why she continued as if reading his mind. "Because I love you Richard Edgar Alexander Rodgers Castle and I wanted to do something for you. You've done so much for me over the years: invited me into your home, looked after me," she listed, "so thank you."

"Always Kate. Always," he assured, and Kate felt her heart skip a beat.

"So, when are you going to let me read the other Nikki Heat books, Castle?" Beckett questioned.

"You can pick them up on Monday?"

"Sounds great," she grinned. "What are the other two called?"

"Urm, 'Naked Heat' and 'Heat Rises'..."

"_Naked Heat_? Really Castle?" she asked.

"I can't help it if your hotness inspired that title, Detective," and he gave a grin.

"Does she iron naked again?" she asked, not really sure if she wanted to hear the answer.

"_No_," he scoffed.

"Do we have sex again?" she raised an eyebrow gesturing between herself and Castle.

"Yes." Beckett rolled her eyes, "I have to give the audience what they want," he explained.

She laughed, "Sure you do. Or..."

"Or?" he asked.

"Maybe you just like picturing yourself having sex with me," Kate suggested.

"Maybe..." he murmured. "But last night was better than anything I've _ever_ imagined."

"Me too," she said timidly.

"You game for round two?" he asked, touching her thigh under the table.

"Don't you mean round four?" Beckett reminded him, as his hand moved higher.

"_Tomato_, tomato," Castle shrugged before making contact with her lips again. Their meal soon forgotten, Castle kissed her deeply before guiding her to the couch. They smiled and laughed as they made love, neither of them feeling this way about anyone before. _This_ was true love.

* * *

**A/N: **I am a 16 year old girl; I am _not_ writing you a sex scene. It was awkward enough trying to write their little make out session in the park, why am I such an awkward person? But was the making out bit okay? Like I'm not expecting it to be Shakespeare, but it was alright, right? Maybe? Help?

As for the yellow and purple favourite colours – Stana thinks that Beckett's favourite colour is purple, and Stana's is yellow so that's why I did that, plus it's a really good colour combination. Hope you enjoyed! **X Verity.**


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: you guys were all so sweet about your advice about it being to awkward to write _romantic _scenes. Thank the universe I'm not the only one :D

* * *

High in the sky, the song that I'm singing  
A sweet little lie, I cry wolf, cry  
Rabbit out of the hat, yes, so that's why I'm bringing  
Some tricks up my sleeve, for noticing me  
It wouldn't cause you any harm, I just want you in my arms  
I can't help, I can't help myself

Baby, there's a shark in the water  
There's something underneath my bed  
Oh, please believe I said  
Baby, there's a shark in the water  
I caught them barking at the moon  
Better be soon

* * *

On Monday morning Kate woke up curled in Castle's arms listening to his alarm go off. She nudged him awake, climbing over him to mute the deafening sound.

"Morning," Castle muttered, the sleep still present in his voice. Beckett was still on top of him from turning off his alarm so she gave him a small kiss good morning, watching a smile play across his lips as his fingers played with the curls in her hair.

Ever since their date on Friday night, they had barely spent a moment apart (except from Castle's _delivery insistent_). Kate didn't think that she'd like to spend time with another person _all the time_, but in fact she was quite enjoying it. They had so much fun together – and no, not just _that kind_ _of fun_; they would watch movies together, cuddle on the couch, play stupid games. It was just fun. And she loved him for it.

"Morning," she replied, burying her head into his chest as he laughed and Beckett could feel the vibrations of the sound run through her.

"Kate, come on, off," he gave her a poke. "Not that I don't love you but I need to get dressed."

"Fine," she groaned, rolling off him and she watched him walk out of the room and into the bathroom with a handful of clothes. Hearing the shower turn on, she snuggled back down in bed, pulling the duvet over her head.

By the time Castle came out she was asleep again. He hated the fact that he made her wake up so early. He knew that when Beckett was on call she got almost no sleep and he, waking her up at 5:30 in the morning, wasn't helping. But Kate insisted she was fine with it when they were talking last night, and who was he to disagree with the beautiful woman in his bed?

He glanced at his watch, noticing that it was about time for her alarm to go off too. He kissed her on her temple gently, but still enough to wake her up. Her eyelids fluttered open and she gave a small moan of content.

"Hey," the detective murmured checking the time. "I must have fallen asleep again."

"Yeah," he grinned, "You did. You go shower and get dressed, I'll make you breakfast," and he dropped a kiss on her hairline before heading towards the door.

"Castle," she stopped him.

"Yeah?"

"I love you," she beamed. She couldn't' get enough of saying those words to him after all these years.

"I love you too," he grinned, coming back to kiss her on the lips, leaving her gasping for air. They gazed at each other, simply smiling, their hearts pounding in their chests. He wanted nothing more than to make love to her right then and there.

"Castle?" Kate interrupted his thoughts. "Breakfast."

"Right, breakfast, got it," he spoke trying to concentrate on moving back towards the door. She was such a tease, but he wouldn't have her any other way.

Beckett smirked watching him leave the room, then dragged her body out of bed. She brought a bag with her to Castle's with a few changes of clothes in it, soon dressed herself and did her make up in the bathroom. She walked into the kitchen with the aroma of bacon and eggs filling the air.

"Hmm, Castle. It smells amazing," she smiled.

"Thanks," he replied, pulling her in for yet another brief kiss.

"Morning you two," spoke Martha watching her son kiss the detective, causing the couple to break away from each other. They were like a pair of teenagers and Martha seemed to have _the worst_ timing ever.

"Morning," they replied in unison, guilt written all over their faces.

"So," the red head clapped her hands together, "what's for breakfast?"

* * *

"Castle," Kate began once they were in Muse, "Are you going to give your manuscript to your publisher today?" she asked. She _really_ wanted him to. This could finally be the book that does it for him – the book that _actually_ makes him a writer.

"Yeah, I've got a meeting scheduled at 11," he smiled shyly. "I hope they like it."

"They have to Castle. It's the best one you've ever written. If they don't it'll be their loss, not yours," she squeezed his hand in encouragement.

"I know, it's just scary to think that this is the book that could be published," the barista gave a slight grin.

"It's okay. I understand," and she did. She'd been with him through this many times before. The disappointment, the rejection, she saw how it hurt him every time they said no. She only wished that they would publish this one, he needed the admiration.

"Thanks," Castle whispered. He couldn't tell her how much it meant to him that she stuck by him through all of this. Kate really was his number one fan.

"We'll I've got to go to work," Beckett sighed, looking at the time. "I'll see you at your place tonight?" she asked.

"Of course," he grinned, leaning in to kiss her, their lips pressed together.

"Good luck at the publisher's," she smiled at him.

"Thanks," he beamed, "Good luck at work," and she strode out of the door.

He was extremely anxious for his meeting, and Castle could tell Beckett could sense it. As he sat outside the office at Black Pawn he received a text from Kate saying_, "Good luck. Love you."_ and had a smiley face at the end. Shoving his phone back in his pocket, he heard a door open.

"Richard Castle," a familiar voice said. He glanced up slowly. _Wait? Gina?_ He had no idea that they would've assigned him Gina out of _all_ the publishers Black Pawn had to offer.

"Hey, um, Gina," he mumbled nervously. "How've you been?"

"I've been good," she spoke professionally and Castle couldn't help but feel glad. He didn't want their history to get in the way of this novel getting published. "Come on in," she moved away from the door, inviting him into the room.

She sauntered behind a large wooden desk with her name "Gina Cowell", engraved into a name plaque and sat down. The walls were decorated with the pictures of books she'd published and two white leather chairs faced her desk. He'd been in the room before, but not recently, and Castle began memorizing all the things that had changed since he was in their last.

"Rick, won't you sit down," she gestured to one of the white leather chairs in front of her and he complied, manuscript in hand.

"Is that your new book?" the published asked pointing to the novel on his lap.

"Yes," he smiled, placing it into her outreached hand.

"_Heat Wave_," she read, looking at the cover. "That's a catchy title. What's it about?" she inquired.

"Well," Castle swallowed, "It's about a detective named Nikki Heat, and she solves murders."

"Nikki Heat, hmm," she spoke thoughtfully. Castle knew that Gina had met Kate a few times in the coffee store, and he was also sure that she knew he was in love with the detective. In fact it was one of the many reasons why they got divorced in the end – his heart belonged to someone else.

She flicked open the first couple of pages, scanning the words. "It looks good," Gina smiled. "Better than the last few you've given me, that's for sure," and Castle let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. "I'd like to read it and tell you what I think."

Castle nodded eagerly. None of his past publishers (including Gina) had given him so much positive feedback this early into the process before. He couldn't help but feel hopeful.

"I'll call you in a couple of days and we'll talk," she told him. "But it's looking good so far," and the barista almost jumped up and down with joy.

"Thank you Gina," he grinned standing up to shake her hand farewell.

"It's okay Ricky, you earned it. I know you've dealt with years of rejections, it's about time you got an offer," she smiled. "_But_, I am not promising anything at this point. Your writing looks good Rick, but I need to read the rest before I make a decision."

"Understood," he grinned, walking towards the door. "I'll see you in a few days."

"See you soon."

The moment he stepped outside the office he pulled out his phone and dialled Beckett. Kate was stuck doing paperwork at her desk but when she saw Castle calling she rushed to the breakroom to talk in privacy, earning a few confused gazes from the boys on her way.

"Hey Castle," she spoke, not even hiding the smile in her voice.

"Hey Kate," he grinned.

"So, how'd it go?" Beckett asked.

"Amazing," he told her. "Really, really well," and the detective beamed in delight.

"Castle, I'm so proud of you, okay?" she replied.

"I know Kate, I know. The publisher said she wants to read it and call me back in a couple of days, but it's looking really good," Castle filled her in, still grinning. "But there's something you need to know," he spoke seriously. Beckett was getting worried, what could have been such a big deal that he was only telling her now?

"What is it Castle?" she inquired, trying to keep the concern out of her voice.

"They appointed Gina to be my publisher," he spat out quickly, wanting to get it over with. He didn't want to keep this a secret from her; he cared about her so much. And he wasn't going to let one of his ex-wives get in the way of that ever again.

_Oh_, the realization hit her. She should've suspected that something like this could happen; Gina did still work as a publisher and Black Pawn after all.

"Kate, say something," he spoke. "_Kate_?"

"Castle, it's fine, honest," she told him. "I appreciate you telling me that Gina might become your fulltime publisher, but I trust you. I trust you not to cheat on me," she breathed. She did trust him. She knew that Castle would never do anything like that to her, and she was sure that after waiting for each other for so long that he wouldn't ruin it – not this quickly anyway, if at all. Beckett understood that they had this whole history – of course she did, she was there through it; but she knew Castle well enough that he would never hurt her. He loved her too much for that.

"Kate, are you sure?" he questioned.

"Yeah. Yeah I am," she smiled to herself and she watched Ryan and Esposito walk into the room, each grabbing a cup of coffee.

"I love you Kate," he said.

Kate looked up cautiously to her partners who were whispering to each other. "I love you too," she spoke proudly, causing Ryan and Espo to stare at her, both clearly puzzled. She disconnected the call, watching the two detectives walk over to her.

"So Beckett, who do you love?" Esposito asked, grinning. Thinking back, she didn't think she'd said _'I love you'_ on the phone to _any_ of her past boyfriends in front of her colleagues. It just showed how much she and Castle loved each other, despite the only recent development in their relationship. In a way, it seemed to her like they had always been in a relationship – they had always cared deeply each other, ever since the first day she walked up to him asking for a skimmed latte with two pumps of sugar-free vanilla.

"No one," she shrugged.

"Didn't sound like no one," Esposito mumbled.

"_Come on Beckett_, you can tell us," Ryan grinned.

"You know you want to," Espo chimed in and Beckett rolled her eyes.

Kate didn't see the harm in letting them know. She had texted Lanie on Sunday, only for her friend to call her, freak out a little (_or a lot_), and demand to know _all_ the details. They were bound to find out sooner or later – at the end of the day they were detectives too.

"Fine," she sighed. "You know Castle?"

"Your coffee-boy Castle?" Esposito questioned.

"Yeah him," Beckett tried to hide her smile. "Well, we're going out."

"Finally!" Ryan exclaimed.

"About damn time!" Espo shouted.

"It only took you, what is it? Eight years?" Ryan added.

"Yeah, well," Beckett shrugged, still grinning though.

"Congratulations," Esposito said sincerely.

"Yeah, we're happy for you both," smiled Ryan.

"Thanks guys," she muttered, watching Montgomery come out of his office though the glass and look around wondering where his detectives had disappeared to.

"Hey, we should probably get back to work," Beckett gestured to Montgomery and they all returned to their desks to complete their paperwork. She looking forward to seeing Castle again that night and was glad that he told her about Gina; it showed how much he trusted her. He really was incredible.

* * *

**A/N: **aren't KBex and Castle the cutest? Anyway, the reason why I took so long to update is because I've been writing another fic but I haven't uploaded any of it yet and probably won't until this one is finished. Despite that, this fic isn't too far from being finished; I can see the finishing line soon. Just a heads up. Also I'm on holiday the next 2 weeks so I don't know how much writing I'll get done. Sorry about that. **X Verity.**


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